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Reflections: How Do I See Myself as a Person

Table of contents, introduction, personal characteristics, roles in society, personal growth, comparisons and external influences, future self, challenges in self-perception.

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Self-analysis: Shaping Identity and Personal Development

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Published: Jan 31, 2024

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Table of contents

Personal background and experiences, strengths and weaknesses, values and beliefs, emotional intelligence, goals and aspirations.

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self perception essay example

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4.5: Self-Perception, Identity, and Communication

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  • Pamela J. Gerber & Heidi Murphy
  • Central New Mexico Community College via https://www.cnm.edu/

In this section, we will discuss how our identity influences communication with ourselves and other people, and, in turn, how others communicate with us.

Self-Perception, Identity, and Communication

A simple way to think of identity is that it is comprised of three main facets: who we think we are, who we want others to think we are, and who others think we are (Verderber, MacGeorge, & Verderber, 2016). The first facet, who we think we are, pertains to our self-perception, and this informs how we communicate with ourselves. For example, let’s say you think you are a smart individual. When you go to approach a difficult problem you might say to yourself “I’m smart- I can do this!” On the other hand, if you don’t think of yourself as very smart, when you go to approach a difficult problem you instead may say to yourself “Oh, this is too difficult. I’ll never get it, so it’s not worth trying.”

The second facet, who we want others to think we are, influences our communication in that we use communication to try to get others to perceive us a particular way. For example, if you want others to think you are cool, you might communicate this nonverbally by dressing in particular style or buying certain brands and accessories.

The final facet, who others think we are, influences the types of messages we receive from other people. For example, let’s say others don’t think you are very intelligent. This will likely cause them talk to you using small words or in a condescending matter (or not talk to you all.)

In addition, identity and communication are mutually reinforcing. This means that messages we receive from others (who they think we are) influence who we think we are. For example, if others think we are intelligent and constantly tell us that we are smart, we will likely also think we are smart. This thinking about ourselves, in turn, is likely to influence how we communicate with others around us. For example, we may use big words or assert our expert opinions.

Identity and the Internet

One of the advantages to technology is that we can carefully craft and edit our online personas and the messages that are sent through mediated-communication channels. This means we have the power to shape how others perceive us. We may only post our best pictures on Facebook or tweet about exciting things we are doing so other perceive us positively. In addition, we can explore identities that we may not be able to explore in our face-to-face interactions. Online we can be anyone we want to be. For example, someone may craft an online persona and interact with others using a different gender identity, which can be much harder to achieve in face-to-face interactions.

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What Is Self-Concept?

Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

self perception essay example

Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change.

self perception essay example

Verywell / Cindy Chung 

  • Development
  • Can It Be Changed?
  • Self-Concept Theories

Frequently Asked Questions

Self-concept is the image we have of ourselves. It is influenced by many forces, including our interaction with important people in our lives. It is how we perceive our behaviors, abilities, and unique characteristics. For example, beliefs such as "I am a good friend" or "I am a kind person" are part of an overall self-concept.

Other examples of self-concept include:

  • How you view your personality traits, such as whether you are an extrovert or introvert
  • How you see your roles in life, such as whether you feel that being a parent, sibling, friend, and partner are important parts of your identity
  • The hobbies or passions that are important to your sense of identity, such as being a sports enthusiast or belonging to a certain political party
  • How you feel about your interactions with the world, such as whether you feel that you are contributing to society

Our self-perception is important because it affects our motivations , attitudes, and behaviors . It also affects how we feel about the person we think we are, including whether we are competent or have self-worth.

Self-concept tends to be more malleable when we're younger and still going through self-discovery and identity formation . As we age and learn who we are and what's important to us, these self-perceptions become much more detailed and organized.

At its most basic, self-concept is a collection of beliefs one holds about oneself and the responses of others. It embodies the answer to the question: " Who am I? " If you want to find your self-concept, list things that describe you as an individual. What are your traits? What do you like? How do you feel about yourself?

Rogers' Three Parts of Self-Concept

Humanist psychologist  Carl Rogers believed that self-concept is made up of three different parts:

  • Ideal self : The ideal self is the person you want to be. This person has the attributes or qualities you are either working toward or want to possess. It's who you envision yourself to be if you were exactly as you wanted.
  • Self-image : Self-image refers to how you see yourself at this moment in time. Attributes like physical characteristics, personality traits , and social roles all play a role in your self-image.
  • Self-esteem : How much you like, accept, and value yourself all contribute to your self-concept. Self-esteem can be affected by a number of factors—including how others see you, how you think you compare to others, and your role in society.

Incongruence and Congruence

Self-concept is not always aligned with reality. When it is aligned, your self-concept is said to be congruent . If there is a mismatch between how you see yourself (your self-image) and who you wish you were (your ideal self), your self-concept is incongruent . This incongruence can negatively affect self-esteem .

Rogers believed that incongruence has its earliest roots in childhood. When parents place conditions on their affection for their children (only expressing love if children "earn it" through certain behaviors and living up to the parents' expectations), children begin to distort the memories of experiences that leave them feeling unworthy of their parents' love.

Unconditional love, on the other hand, helps to foster congruence. Children who experience such love—also referred to as family love —feel no need to continually distort their memories in order to believe that other people will love and accept them as they are.

How Self-Concept Develops

Self-concept develops, in part, through our interaction with others. In addition to family members and close friends, other people in our lives can contribute to our self-identity.

For instance, one study found that the more a teacher believes in a high-performing student's abilities, the higher that student's self-concept. (Interestingly, no such association was found with lower-performing students.)

Self-concept can also be developed through the stories we hear. As an example, one study found that female readers who were "deeply transported" into a story about a leading character with a traditional gender role had a more feminist self-concept than those who weren't as moved by the story.

The media plays a role in self-concept development as well—both mass media and social media . When these media promote certain ideals, we're more likely to make those ideals our own. And the more often these ideals are presented, the more they affect our self-identity and self-perception.

Can Self-Concept Be Changed?

Self-concept is not static, meaning that it can change. Our environment plays a role in this process. Places that hold a lot of meaning to us actively contribute to our future self-concept through both the way we relate these environments to ourselves and how society relates to them.

Self-concept can also change based on the people with whom we interact. This is particularly true with regard to individuals in our lives who are in leadership roles. They can impact the collective self (the self in social groups) and the relational self (the self in relationships).

In some cases, a medical diagnosis can change self-concept by helping people understand why they feel the way they do—such as someone receiving an autism diagnosis later in life, finally providing clarity as to why they feel different.

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Other Self-Concept Theories

As with many topics within psychology , a number of other theorists have proposed different ways of thinking about self-concept.

Social Identity

Social psychologist Henri Tajfel developed social identity theory, which states that self-concept is composed of two key parts:

  • Personal identity : The traits and other characteristics that make you unique
  • Social identity : Who you are based on your membership in social groups, such as sports teams, religions, political parties, or social class

This theory states that our social identity influences our self-concept, thus affecting our emotions and behaviors. If we're playing sports, for instance, and our team loses a game, we might feel sad for the team (emotion) or act out against the winning team (behavior).

Multiple Dimensions

Psychologist Bruce A. Bracken had a slightly different theory and believed that self-concept was multidimensional, consisting of six independent traits:

  • Academic : Success or failure in school
  • Affect : Awareness of emotional states
  • Competence : Ability to meet basic needs
  • Family : How well you work in your family unit
  • Physical : How you feel about your looks, health, physical condition, and overall appearance
  • Social : Ability to interact with others

In 1992, Bracken developed the Multidimensional Self-Concept Scale, a comprehensive assessment that evaluates each of these six elements of self-concept in children and adolescents.

Self-concept development is never finished. Though one's self-identity is thought to be primarily formed in childhood, your experiences as an adult can also change how you feel about yourself. If your self-esteem increases later in life, for instance, it can improve your self-concept.

Our self-concept can affect the method by which we communicate. If you feel you are a good writer, for instance, you may prefer to communicate in writing versus speaking with others.

It can also affect the way we communicate. If your social group communicates a certain way, you would likely choose to communicate that way as well. Studies on teens have connected high self-concept clarity with more open communication with parents.

Self-concept refers to a broad description of ourselves ("I am a good writer") while self-esteem includes any judgments or opinions we have of ourselves ("I feel proud to be a good writer"). Put another way, self-concept answers the question: Who am I? Self-esteem answers the question: How do I feel about who I am?

Our self-concept impacts how we respond to life, so a well-developed self-concept helps us respond in ways that are more positive and beneficial for us. One of the ways it does this is by enabling us to recognize our worth. A well-developed self-concept also helps keep us from internalizing negative feedback from others.

Different cultures have different beliefs. They have different ideas of how dependent or independent one should be, different religious beliefs, and differing views of socioeconomic development.

All of these cultural norms influence self-concept by providing the structure of what is expected within that society and how one sees oneself in relation to others.

Bailey JA 2nd. Self-image, self-concept, and self-identity revisited . J Natl Med Assoc . 2003;95(5):383-386.

Mercer S. Self-concept: Situating the self . In: Mercer S, Ryan S, Williams M, eds. Psychology for Language Learning . Palgrave Macmillan. doi:10.1057/9781137032829_2

Argyle M. Social encounters: Contributions to Social Interaction . 1st ed . Routledge.

Koch S. Formulations of the person and the social context . In: Psychology: A study of a science. Vol. III. McGraw-Hill:184-256.

Pesu L, Viljaranta J, Aunola K. The role of parents' and teachers' beliefs in children's self-concept development . J App Develop Psychol . 2016;44:63-71. doi:10.1016/j.appdev.2016.03.001

Richter T, Appel M, Calio F. Stories can influence the self-concept . Social Influence . 2014;9(3):172-88. doi:10.1080/15534510.2013.799099

Vandenbosch L, Eggermont S. The interrelated roles of mass media and social media in adolescents' development of an objectified self-concept: A longitudinal study . Communc Res . 2015. doi:10.1177/0093650215600488

Prince D. What about place? Considering the role of physical environment on youth imagining of future possible selves . J Youth Stud . 2014;17(6):697-716. doi:10.1080/13676261.2013.836591

Kark R, Shamir B. The dual effect of transformational leadership: priming relational and collective selves and further effects on followers . In: Avolio BJ, Yammarino FJ, eds.  Monographs in Leadership and Management . Vol 5. Emerald Group Publishing Limited; 2013:77-101. doi:10.1108/S1479-357120130000005010

Stagg SD, Belcher H. Living with autism without knowing: receiving a diagnosis in later life . Health Psychol Behav Med . 2019;7(1):348-361. doi:10.1080/21642850.2019.1684920

Tajfel H, Turner J. An integrative theory of intergroup conflict . In: Hogg MA, Abrams D, eds.  Intergroup Relations: Essential Readings. Psychology Press:94–109.

Scheepers D. Social identity theory . Social Psychol Act . 2019. doi:10.1007/978-3-030-13788-5_9

Bracken BA. Multidimensional Self Concept Scale . American Psychological Association. doi:10.1037/t01247-000

Sampthirao P. Self-concept and interpersonal communication . Int J Indian Psychol . 2016;3(3):6. dip:18.01.115/20160303

Van Dijk M, Branje S, Keijsers L, Hawk S, Hale !, Meeus W. Self-concept clarity across adolescence: Longitudinal associations with open communication with parents and internalizing symptoms . J Youth Adolesc . 2013;43:1861-76. doi:10.1007/s10964-013-0055-x

Vignoles V, Owe E, Becker M, et al. Beyond the 'east-west' dichotomy: Global variation in cultural models of selfhood . J Exp Psychol Gen . 2016;145(8):966-1000. doi:10.1037/xge0000175

Weiten W, Dunn DS, Hammer EY. Psychology Applied to Modern Life: Adjustment in the 21st Century . Cengage Learning.

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

Self-Perception Essays

The role of emotional intelligence in cultivating inclusive leadership, the influence of gender on self-perception and responsibilities, social media and self-perception, popular essay topics.

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How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us Definition Essay

People manifest their attitudes through their behavior when going through different experiences. When a person feels weak or confused, the people who observe him or her know that there is a problem. The feelings of people change when they are not comfortable with what they are doing, which manifest in the behavior. Individuals tend to believe what they are told is possible if their attitude is positive. When people are asked by others to do something, which is difficult, they first consider how others could benefit from the same.

Self-perception is a trait that develops in a person towards something through daily observation and interaction with others. People develop attitudes but do not relate them with their different moods when going through certain experiences. When one is able to interpret his or her behavior in a rational manner, it becomes possible to understand other people.

A perception of self is a common trait for all people where one can think that he or she is handsome, bright or difficult. There are situations where perceptions of self in a person have developed in a manner that does not match with how other people perceive the individual. For example, you might see yourself as being very organized while others take you to be bossy. Therefore, it is paramount for us to be informed about the way other people perceive us if their perceptions about us are negative.

This helps to improve and ensure that our behavior is acceptable and other people can benefit from our actions. There are situations where our perception on other people changes when we know more about them. The information on how other people perceive us is important so that we can compare it with self-perception. For example, when other people believe that we can be leaders and tell us, we tend to understand why they always consult us in case of any question.

Perceptions of self refer to personality in human beings about their physical size as well as intelligence. For example, people may be perceived as bragging if they talk too much about their children. The significant thing is to know how other people perceive us in order to relate it with self-perception. However, perception of people on others does not always reflect the reality about the character.

For example, some people are less self-defensive but other people may accuse them that they are too defensive. The problem is that an individual may clarify about a certain issue but other people perceive him or her to be defensive. That is why conflicts arise because we think that we have done what others wanted but later realize that we are annoying them. This does not require us to change but we should know about the problem in order to solve it if it recurs.

The hidden feelings of people are different and we are not able to know about them. When a person does something that annoys others he or she may not know how they feel about it. This requires everyone to be conscious when relating with other people. Many people use nonverbal cues when they do not like others such as walking out in a gathering.

A businessperson may also conceal his or her negative feelings towards certain customers because he or she is aware that doing that would put off the customers. Perceptions of self are validated by asking the people we trust about their perceptions on us so that we obtain reliable information, which help us to know why people behave in certain ways.

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IvyPanda. (2023, November 2). How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us. https://ivypanda.com/essays/perceptions-of-self/

"How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us." IvyPanda , 2 Nov. 2023, ivypanda.com/essays/perceptions-of-self/.

IvyPanda . (2023) 'How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us'. 2 November.

IvyPanda . 2023. "How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us." November 2, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/perceptions-of-self/.

1. IvyPanda . "How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us." November 2, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/perceptions-of-self/.

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IvyPanda . "How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us." November 2, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/perceptions-of-self/.

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Self Perception Theory

The basic idea, theory, meet practice.

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We typically view the interaction between attitudes and behaviors as a causal sequence that progresses linearly from attitude to behavior. We might have an attitude towards work ethic, for example, which would translate into some behavior, like working overtime to get the job done. To assume a reversal in the sequence of causation; for example, behavior leading to attitude would seem counterintuitive. It can certainly seem backwards to presume working overtime  causes  a belief in work ethic, rather than work ethic causes hard work.

Self perception theory proposes such a causal link. This theory argues that people become aware of certain attitudes by observing their own behavior. This is the case when internal cues such as sentiment are unclear, and the individual attributes their attitude or belief to some form of self perception around their behavior. It is a similar process to how we would infer another individual’s inner state by observing  their  behavior.

Consider Dave, a carpenter who works 50 hours a week. Dave has never really stopped to think about how he feels towards standardized work weeks and labor regulations, or work ethic in general. One evening, at the bar with some friends, someone mentions the 35-hour work week in France and an article she read about increased productivity gains at companies who introduced four-day work weeks. Dave has never heard such talk and doesn’t have any preexisting attitudes towards the concept. When someone asks what he thinks, he supposes that 40 hours isn’t that much, after all, he tends to work 50.

Association with human beings lures one into self-observation. – Lionel Robbins describing economic science in terms of scarcity in Essay on the Nature and Significance of Economic Science (1932).

Cognitive Dissonance : A state of discomfort following information that is inconsistent with one’s existing attitudes or beliefs. (See more on the concept  here .)

Self-perception theory was first proposed by Daryl Bem in 1967 1  as an alternative account of cognitive dissonance, where certain circumstances lead to self-described attitudes that are a function of the individual’s observations of their own behavior. Bem cited evidence from a number of studies that support his theory, such as changes in belief and attitude statements following induced role-play. He also drew a key parallel between self-perception theory and the inferences we make regarding others’ attitudes, where assumptions we make about ourselves are analogous to the assumptions an outside observer would have about us. “Just as a communicator is more persuasive to others if he is known to be receiving no payment for his communication,” he wrote, “so too, it is found that he is more likely to believe himself under such circumstances.”

A social psychologist at Cornell University, Bem is known for first proposing self perception theory. He also happens to be known as a proponent of parapsychology, where he published a paper offering statistical evidence for “precognition,” a phenomenon that has been deemed pseudoscience by a number of academics.

Consequences

Although self perception theory was initially seen by some as a concept that challenged cognitive dissonance, further research building on Bem’s work has concluded that self perception theory and cognitive dissonance do indeed have different applications, with the two phenomena being complements rather than substitutes. 2  The critical difference is that self perception theory relates to situations where an individual’s attitude is ambiguous or weak. If we consider the example highlighted earlier, with Dave the carpenter, had Dave had an existing strong belief in work ethic along with an aversion to idleness, his rejection of his friend’s comments around shortened work weeks could be labeled cognitive dissonance, as the information she was presenting was inconsistent with his existing beliefs. However, in the case where his attitude was unclear, he presumably relied on the observation of his own behavior to inform his attitude.

Self perception theory has had notable consequences in marketing and consumer research. The well known foot-in-the-door technique, where getting a customer to agree to a small request increases the chances of them agreeing to a larger request down the road, has been explained by some researchers as the same process as self perception. As the authors of a paper 3  from  The Association of Consumer Research  wrote, “it is hypothesized that the foot-in-the-door is effective because people use their own behavior as a cue regarding their attitudinal dispositions. Since external pressure for the initial behavior is assumed to be minimal, people infer a positive attitude from their compliant behavior, which in turn guides subsequent action.”

The theory has also been applied in psychotherapeutic settings, as it offers an outline for how self described attitudes and beliefs may be operating during counseling or psychotherapy. 4  It is common in this arena for individuals to explore attitudes that may be vague, relying on their personal narrative to probe such feelings. For example, someone struggling with alcoholism may go from having an ambiguous attitude towards a person to inferring that person makes them anxious as they look back and see that they drank prior to seeing the other person. Self perception theory has also been used within psychotherapy in regard to heterosexual anxiety, 5  where individuals form the attitude that they have poor social skills because they have had no dates. Therapeutic techniques aimed at shifting this attribution have been found to be an effective treatment in overcoming the mental barrier.

Controversies

As mentioned earlier, the initial view that self perception theory and cognitive dissonance were competitive theories sparked controversy. Since then, it has become accepted that both theories apply in different situations, however this can still result in debate. It is not always clear whether someone’s attitudes are vague or already predefined, so in non-experimental settings, determining whether an individual’s response was cognitive dissonance or self perception might be challenging under certain scenarios.

In regard to self perception theory as the underlying mechanism behind the foot-in-the-door technique, it is worth mentioning that this notion has also been challenged. Jerry Burger of Santa Clara University published a study in 1999 concluding that the two phenomena are unrelated. 6  His main argument was that self perception may indeed be a factor in compliant behavior during a foot-in-the-door intervention, however there are additional psychological processes at play such as norm conformity and commitment, among others, that likely outweigh the influence of self perception.

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Gender and Self-perception in Competition

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  • Bem, D. J. (1967). Self-perception: An alternative interpretation of cognitive dissonance phenomena.  Psychological review ,  74 (3), 183.
  • Fazio, R. H., Zanna, M. P., & Cooper, J. (1977). Dissonance and self-perception: An integrative view of each theory’s proper domain of application.  Journal of Experimental Social Psychology ,  13 (5), 464-479.
  • Sternthal, B., Scott, C. A., & Dholakia, R. R. (1976). Self-Perception as a Means of Personal Influence: The Foot-in-the-Door Technique.  ACR North American Advances .
  • Robak, R. W. (2001). Self-definition in psychotherapy: is it time to revisit self-perception theory?.  North American Journal of Psychology ,  3 (3).
  • Montgomery, R. L., & Haemmerlie, F. M. (1986). Self-perception theory and the reduction of heterosocial anxiety.  Journal of social and clinical psychology ,  4 (4), 503-512.
  • Burger, J. M. (1999). The foot-in-the-door compliance procedure: A multiple-process analysis and review.  Personality and social psychology review ,  3 (4), 303-325.

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  1. Self Perception Essay Examples

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  2. Reflections: How Do I See Myself as a Person

    Self-perception is a complex, multifaceted topic, and can be influenced by many factors including our upbringing, our experiences, and our relationships. In this essay, I will explore the topic of self-perception, delving into the various aspects of how I see myself as a person, including my personal characteristics, my roles in society, and ...

  3. Self-Perception: Definition, Theory, & Questions

    Self-Perception: Definition, Theory, & Questions. By Charlie Huntington, M. A., Ph.D. Candidate. . Reviewed by Tchiki Davis, M.A., Ph.D. Self-perception is how we see ourselves - and we don't see ourselves exactly as we truly are. Read on to learn about how the theory of self-perception and how we can come to see ourselves more accurately.

  4. Self-Perception Essay

    Self-Perception Essay. Sort By: Page 1 of 50 - About 500 essays. Better Essays. Self Perception. 1586 Words; 7 Pages; 6 Works Cited ... Self-perception is defined as follows, "Self-perception theory relies on situational and dispositional attributions similar to attribution theory" (Frymier207). Bem created this theory to help understand ...

  5. Self-Analysis: Shaping Identity and Personal Development: [Essay

    Emotional intelligence, defined as the ability to recognize and manage one's emotions, as well as understand the emotions of others, plays a crucial role in self-analysis. By evaluating my emotional intelligence, I have been able to gain a deeper understanding of my own motivations and behaviors, as well as navigate interpersonal relationships ...

  6. Self Perception Essay

    Self Perception Essay. Response Assignment 3 The self and our perception of others are thoughts that are constantly flowing through our minds subconsciously. Prior to reading the readings for the week, I did not realize the impact that our self-perception had on our daily lives and interactions.

  7. 4.5: Self-Perception, Identity, and Communication

    Self-Perception, Identity, and Communication. A simple way to think of identity is that it is comprised of three main facets: who we think we are, who we want others to think we are, and who others think we are (Verderber, MacGeorge, & Verderber, 2016). The first facet, who we think we are, pertains to our self-perception, and this informs how ...

  8. Self-Concept in Psychology: Definition, Development, Theories

    Self-concept is the image we have of ourselves. It is influenced by many forces, including our interaction with important people in our lives. It is how we perceive our behaviors, abilities, and unique characteristics. For example, beliefs such as "I am a good friend" or "I am a kind person" are part of an overall self-concept.

  9. Self-Perception Essay Examples

    The Influence of Gender on Self-Perception and Responsibilities. Although Maher and Sothy lead utterly distinct lives with different circumstances and intersectional identities, they share a gender identity that shapes their responsibilities, self-perception, and relationships with men. In Amna's "Café May," Maher is "unmarried and ...

  10. How We See Ourselves v. How Others See Us

    Perceptions of self refer to personality in human beings about their physical size as well as intelligence. For example, people may be perceived as bragging if they talk too much about their children. The significant thing is to know how other people perceive us in order to relate it with self-perception.

  11. Self Perception Theory

    Self-perception theory was first proposed by Daryl Bem in 1967 1 as an alternative account of cognitive dissonance, where certain circumstances lead to self-described attitudes that are a function of the individual's observations of their own behavior. Bem cited evidence from a number of studies that support his theory, such as changes in belief and attitude statements following induced role ...

  12. Self-Perception Essays

    Self-concept and perception work the same way. Through interpersonal communication we relate, communicate and evolve with other people physically and emotionally and it's affected by one's self-concept, perception and emotion. Self-concept is a term used to refer to how someone thinks about or perceives themselves.

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