educational qualification essay

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Educational Qualifications Essay

Posted by David S. Wills | Oct 17, 2022 | Model Essays | 0

Today, we are going to look at an IELTS writing question that is all about educational qualifications and explore some ways to craft a great essay based upon it.

Analysing the Question

Here is our question for today:

Some people believe that educational qualifications will always bring success in life. Other people say that educational qualifications do not necessarily bring success. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

As you can see, it is a “ discuss both views ” type of question and for that we need to do three things:

Discuss the first view
Discuss the second view
Give our opinion

If we omit any of those three things, we will get a very poor score for Task Response.

So what are the two views here?

Educational qualifications will always bring success in life.
Educational qualifications won’t always bring success in life.

The important part to note is the word “always,” which provides us with a very specific meaning. It means that this isn’t just about qualifications being important but rather about them guaranteeing success. If you failed to realise that, you would seriously struggle to get a good score.

Planning your Answer

Once you have analysed the question and you feel that you completely understand it, you need to do a few things:

Brainstorm some ideas.
Pick the best ones.
Figure out how to discuss those ideas.
Put them into a coherent structure.

When you are brainstorming ideas , it doesn’t matter if they are amazing or not. You can whittle them down to the best ones later.

It is a good idea to decide early which side of the argument you agree with and then make sure that those ideas are more convincing. However, you can write a balanced answer if you want.

Remember that if you really disagree with one view or think that it is weak, you still have to discuss it but you don’t have to give the notion much credence. In fact, you can use that part of the essay to offer counterarguments. This could be considered a form of concession paragraph .

For example, here is how I might structure an essay:

Remember that there is no such thing as a single perfect structure that you must follow. There are different ways to write great essays and you should write however you feel best conveys the information needed. Still, always include an introduction and conclusion and aim for between 4 and 5 paragraphs .

You can learn all about how to plan and structure an essay in this book:

Sample Band 9 Answer: Educational Qualifications Essay

It used to be common to hear people claim that educational qualifications practically guarantee success, but nowadays more people realise that nothing is guaranteed and that qualifications, whilst useful, are limited in their capacity to bring accomplishments. This essay will look at both viewpoints and then argue in favour of the latter.

To begin with, it is understandable that some people, and particularly those who grew up in a different era, might feel that qualifications almost guarantee that a person will be successful. After all, it can hardly be denied that education is important and that it allows people far greater opportunities. Specifically, when people complete various courses and obtain different certificates and diplomas, they have a far better chance of finding a good job. However, whilst this is certainly true, none of that actually guarantees success.

These days, it is very common for young people in certain countries to complete their secondary education and then go on to the tertiary level. As a result, they often earn some kind of degree. However, whilst this does provide them with opportunities in the job market, it does not mean that they will necessarily thrive. From the offset, they will have a lot of competition, and then they will find themselves working in an environment that their education may not have fully prepared them for. Highly qualified people may be fired or forced to quit and often find themselves unemployed for long periods. Meanwhile, some people with few or even no qualifications are capable of working hard, making smart choices, and achieving great things.

In conclusion, educational qualifications are important but they certainly do not always lead to success. That is determined mostly by other factors.

Notes on my Answer

As you can see, I have followed the structure that I laid out above for writing my qualifications essay. I presented the opposing view first, explaining it as clearly as possible. Here, I used careful language to show that this is not my opinion because I did not want to mislead my reader. I said:

it is understandable that some people, and particularly those who grew up in a different era, might feel that qualifications almost guarantee that a person will be successful

After giving a fair discussion of this side of the argument, I used the last sentence in paragraph two to counter that viewpoint and naturally transition into my next paragraph, which argues against it.

In terms of vocabulary and grammar, I have tried to be as accurate as possible, which is the most important thing. For a good score in Lexical Resource , you should not seek out so-called advanced vocabulary, but rather always strive to find the right word for a situation. For specific vocabulary related to educational qualifications, you can read this article by the Department of Employment in Queensland, Australia. It contains some good, specific phrases that you could use.

In this case, our topic was education (with perhaps work as a secondary topic). Here are some useful words and phrases:

practically guaranteed success
their capacity to bring success
complete various courses
obtain different certificates and diplomas
finding a good job
tertiary level
earn some kind of degree
opportunities in the job market
Highly qualified people
find themselves unemployed

I paid close attention to collocation so that all my words went together naturally and reasonably. I have also tried to avoid repetition , though certain words inevitably appear a few times because of their importance.

About The Author

David S. Wills

David S. Wills is the author of Scientologist! William S. Burroughs and the 'Weird Cult' and the founder/editor of Beatdom literary journal. He lives and works in rural Cambodia and loves to travel. He has worked as an IELTS tutor since 2010, has completed both TEFL and CELTA courses, and has a certificate from Cambridge for Teaching Writing. David has worked in many different countries, and for several years designed a writing course for the University of Worcester. In 2018, he wrote the popular IELTS handbook, Grammar for IELTS Writing and he has since written two other books about IELTS. His other IELTS website is called IELTS Teaching.

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Discussing Both Opinions

In this essay you have to discuss both opinions and also give your own opinion .

These are the two opinions:

Educational qualifications will always bring success in life
Educational qualifications do not necessarily bring success

You should always pay careful attention to the words used in the essay question.

A key one in this question is the word always .

Do educational qualifications ALWAYS bring success? You can have your own opinion on this, and maybe you think they do.

In my opinion however, I'd say that though they can do, this is not always the case.

So that will be my view which I must make clear in the essay .

But whatever your opinion is, you must discuss both sides of the issue as you are told to do so in the task.

Check out the model answer to see how an essay like this can be answered and organised.

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Discuss both views and give your opinion

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

Write at least 250 words.

Model Answer:

Some people find academic degrees or other training essential milestones for future success, while others believe that this does not guarantee future success and there are other relevant factors just as crucial. Personally, I take the opinion that success is not guaranteed.

On the one hand, gaining educational qualifications is certainly a method with which to gain success in certain areas of life. With regards to a career, it makes a person more competitive as employers will generally seek people who are well-qualified for the best and most richly rewarded positions in their company. This is true for all types of work, be it as an accountant or lawyer or work in the building trade. It can also be viewed as bringing success in terms of one’s own development, as for some people gaining more educational qualifications is not for work but instead leads to a sense of personal accomplishment and fulfillment.

On the other hand, it is not certain that success will follow. In terms of work, many people study hard to become well-qualified but then fail to reach the heights of success that they expected. This is because in today’s world there is a high level of competition for many jobs and a high number of graduates or qualified people. Not only this, there are other skills needed aside from qualifications. ‘People skills’ are also very important and so regardless of the level of qualifications, those who cannot get along well with others may be less likely to achieve the success they desire.

In my opinion, therefore, educational qualifications can bring success in life for many people, yet there are no guarantees this will be the case. Other factors such as the current job market and personal skills are also factors of importance.

(292 Words)

The Educational Qualifications and Success Essay answers the question fully.

The two sides of the argument are discussed and the writer provides a personal view on the issue.

Each body paragraph explains and extends the arguments.

The essay has good coherence and cohesion . It is divided up into appropriate body paragraphs and the sentences are linked together well.

There are examples of high level vocabulary or lexis and collocations:

essential milestones
relevant factors
guarantee future success
well-qualified
most richly rewarded positions
accomplishment and fulfillment
heights of success
‘People skills’

There is also a good level of complexity, variety, and accuracy in the grammar. For example:

Some people...while others believe...
.. .a method with which t o...
...people who are well-qualified
...be it as an accountant or...
...as for some gaining...
...because in today’s world...
...those who cannot get...

The essay would therefore achieve a high band score.

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How to Write an Essay about Your Qualifications

In this tutorial, you will learn how to write an essay about your qualifications.

Writing such an essay is a great way to showcase your skills and knowledge to potential universities or employers. It can help you stand out and make a great impression if done correctly.

So let’s dive right into it.

In writing an essay about your qualifications, you must first consider what you want to highlight to your potential university or employer. Pick a main idea, select your top three qualifications, write an introduction and a paragraph for each qualification you chose, and finally, a conclusion.

Planning and organizing your thoughts can make writing an essay easier. So, take your time and follow this tutorial to keep your ideas flowing.

First, you need to choose your main idea.

Choosing a central idea that covers all the qualifications you want to highlight will help you understand your essay’s structure. To do this, you can think of how your top three qualifications help you.

Your main idea might answer questions like: How do these qualifications make you the right candidate?

Whatever you pick will be your essay’s thesis . So, it’s best to keep it simple.

For example, we can say, “My top qualifications help me succeed.”

Next, select your top three qualifications.

Breaking your main idea into supporting points will help keep the ideas flowing.

In your essay, it’s easy to think of qualifications you want to talk about because everyone has some great qualifications.

But be careful not to talk about too many or too few.

So, let’s use the Power of Three !

The Power of Three is a three-part structure that helps you create your essay’s body paragraphs by dividing your main idea into three supporting points.

Three is the perfect number the brain can handle, and it always works. So, selecting your top three qualifications is the best way to go.

Make sure your supporting points are distinct from one another to keep the ideas flowing and create a great thesis statement .

Now let’s see how this works.

Let’s use these three qualifications for our sample essay:

1. I am a team player

This section will describe what it means to be a team player and how it proves the central idea: how it helps achieve success .

We can answer the following questions to help us keep the ideas flowing:

Why is being a team player important in the workplace or school?
How does being a team player help you succeed?

2. I take feedback well

Like the first qualification, we need to use this qualification to prove the main idea. So, let’s try to answer these questions in this part of our essay:

Why do you need to take feedback well?
How does this help you succeed?

3. I am determined

Again, we need to show how being determined helps with success. To do this, we can answer these questions:

How do you show determination at work or school?
How does this qualification help you succeed?

After dividing your main idea into three distinct supporting points, you will have a clear picture of your essay’s structure. In the next step, you will learn how to expand them into an entire essay.

Write your introductory paragraph and body paragraphs.

Now that you understand your essay’s structure, you can write an introductory paragraph and three body paragraphs — one for each qualification.

To write an introductory paragraph , you need an opening sentence (introduction) that briefly sets your essay’s context. Then, you will proceed with the thesis and three supporting points.

Here’s an example of an introductory paragraph for our essay:

“In the modern world, qualifications are an important part of any career. My top qualifications help me succeed. Being a team player provides me with learning opportunities and cultivates my relationships. Taking feedback well helps me develop my character and skills. And my determination helps me overcome challenges and continuously improve.”

Note how our introductory paragraph goes from general to specific, starting from our introduction sentence to our main idea and three specific qualifications.

Now let’s write the body of the essay.

To write body paragraphs , start with a topic sentence summarizing your point. Then, explain it briefly and illustrate it using examples .

Here are examples of body paragraphs for our essay:

Paragraph 1

“Being a team player is an essential qualification for success in any field. It helps me develop trust in my colleagues, build relationships, and promote collaboration. In addition, being a team player allows me to accomplish more tasks than doing things alone. For instance, I volunteer to work late to help my coworkers achieve a goal, although it is not my job to do so.”

Paragraph 2

“Taking feedback well is a crucial skill for achieving success in both my personal and professional life. It means receiving suggestions or criticisms constructively, which allows me to learn and make necessary changes. It also helps me see challenges as opportunities to grow continuously. I listen carefully when someone gives me feedback and consider how I can use it to improve.”

Paragraph 3

“Determination is one of the keys to becoming successful. It means a strong commitment to achieving goals and working passionately despite obstacles. I stay focused on what I want to achieve. I also keep myself motivated despite setbacks, challenges, and failures by maintaining a positive attitude and developing a growth mindset.”

Note that we followed the diagram above, starting from the topic sentence down to some examples that illustrate it.

We also answered some of the questions above and showed how these qualifications are keys to success.

Lastly, write your concluding paragraph.

Do you want an easy and quick way to write your essay’s concluding paragraph ? I recommend restating your thesis statement using different words.

Why? Doing so will give you all you need to conclude your essay, and this method is time-tested. So it always works!

Here’s a concluding paragraph for our essay:

“My top qualifications have helped me achieve success. I honed my skills as a team player, always seeking opportunities to grow and learn from my coworkers. I also take feedback constructively, using it to develop myself professionally and personally. And my determination has helped me overcome challenges and continuously improve, ensuring that I am focused on my goals.”

Great! Now we’re done writing the sample essay.

I hope this tutorial has answered your question. Now it’s time to write your essay about your qualifications!

Tutor Phil is an e-learning professional who helps adult learners finish their degrees by teaching them academic writing skills.

Some people believe educational qualifications always bring success. Others think educational qualifications do not necessarily bring success. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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171 comments.

Dear Mrs.Rebecca, First of all, I would like to thank you for responding to my comment by saying all the teachers work full-time besides engvid.I really appreciate for taking time reply. Thank you very much for all of your video lessons. They are really very useful. Could you, please tell us rules that govern the maintenance of tenses and speeches in academic essay writings. I would be thankful, if you go into depth of the details of essay writing.This has been my long standing request to all the teachers for long time. Kindly make a video lesson which would last atleast for about 15 minutes. Thank you very much once again!!

Very useful lesson Rebecca, now I can talk about my educational qualifications.

Thanks a million, kind regards.

thank you very much ms.Rebbeca.. it is very helpful lesson.. i don’t study at the universty yet , but I think that will help soon ..

Then make it dude. . .

thank you very much !!!!! this lesson is so helpful .. im learning a lot (: could you teach the difference between of and from please??!!!!

thank you so much MRS.Rebecca, could u tell me if there is a mistake in these sentences : 1- I have a BS in Telecom Engineering from Damascus University 2-I graduated from the university of Damascus with BS in Telecom Engineering. 3- I was awarded a BS in Telecom Engineering by Damascus university. 4- I completed a BS in Telecom Engineering at Damascus university. my best wishes.

In my opinion , your sentences are OK

Am I right Mrs. Rebeca

sentence 2,there is a mistake,add the ‘a’ before BS, so it should be ‘with a BS’

in a few months I will graduate from EngVid. LOL. all the best 4 u lovely Rebecca. greeting from Mexico, viva Canada too.

hey rebecca how are you doing first of all thank you very much for this video not just this but for all the video any way please rebecca i have a qestion for you please when i tried to writ something or when i heared something and i want to put it down i found it it’s very deffeculte please can you help me to overcome this problem please as soon as possible thank you very much again god bless you

It’s my first time I learn about telling education, thank you Rebbeca. And I would introducing my education. I obtained an MM in Management from Padjadjaran University.Is it correct?

I am in Australia since two months now, and I think people use “Uni” for “University”. I that specific to Australia or is it commonly used, or just correct and understood?

Thank you for your answer :) Clement

Dear Clement! Uni for university is used everywhere round the world.

Thanks I learned it.

Thanks you ;)!!! I’m already got it ^^

Thanks alot

Rebecca, what should we say if we want to find out more about someone’s education. How can we ask some person a question about this. Is it correct if I say Where did you graduate from? These are very rare question, and almost I’ve never heard that one person asked another about this. Please respond ASAP!

Can I say: “I am graduated from …” ?

Thank you so much for your nice efforts.

i need a quiz

Hi I’m interested for taking an English course in Canada do you have courses?

Very helpful! Great job and thank’s for all! But unfortunatly I didn’t find the quiz you talk about it…

thank you very much Rebecca

Thank you so much.

hi,Teacher Ribecca! Your lessons are very helpful! but i have confused words,could you explain me about the way to use “because” and “since” with mean is reason?

Excellent no words to descibe,…

hi rebecca is it correct to say i have a BA in economics .i’m looking forward to your answer thanks

hi rebecca thank you for this lesson .is it correct to say i have a BA in economics

thanks for this high effor

Dear Teacher Rebecca thanks of your effective teaching I answered all 10 question easily& correctly and got 100 thanks of your teaching.

Thank you for your efforts, they help me a lot.

I want to ask about the vocabulary of the BTS Conductor …. could u help me Rebecca :) ? thnx :)

dear rebecca made in p.r.o.c what does it mean ? it means = people’s republic of china = but in fact according to me it must be public republic of china is not it ? how can you explain it to me please l need your explanation best wishes from turkey murat

Dear Mrs.Rebecca,

About clients and customers, the big companies who buy stuffs, (small parts of a big equipment, for instance, from other small companies (suppliers) are “clients” os “customers”?

hi guys very nice

Hi Rebecca, Thank You very much for your work. You have a great idea and I want to say THANK YOU. Thant is all. Have a nice day. Andrej

I am a high school graduate. Will you explain how to explain the case more lower education?

dear Rebecco! first of all i woul like to thanks you for your humanitarian services, so i want to join with your side, and i love to be your student, i dont know it will be approved or not? so my name is Gulaqa from Afghanistan- Bamyan province, so your lessons and guide, excitung me to start learning english please help me dear nice teacher, so bye for now

Rebecca, what do you think is the best way to discover problem at myself? Namely, I know more than 20000 the most frequently used words in english, but when I want to speak it goes nicely, but not as well as I’d like, I’d like to speak more fluently, like a native english speaker. What would you suggest me to do in order to achieve this result? Thank you. . .

ms.rebacca, you are doing a good job. this is my question, in fact i have a answer for you and you need make a question for that…

“barak obamaa is the 25 th president of america”

please give me a question for this answer… i awaits your reply… thanks

Rebecca, very nice class! Very good job!!

great work you have done thanks for this helpful lesson.

Think You Mrs Rebbeca.For helping me with english.

I got a BA in sociology from KFU (:

At first,I would like to thank you for your helpful, I’m very happy to have a nice teacher,such as you,I like also your accent .Please could you tell me where is quiz?Because I didn’t find it

it is kinda hard to learn English according to Turkish people like me :)

This is a great lesson..

Thank you so much Rebecca..

HI Rebecca, I think you are the best teacher! Could you please teach me HOW can I pronounce the letter “J” as in Job, enjoy, Japan..It is almost impossible for me to say it right. My teacher tried to teach me, but I did not get it. Thanks Rebecca…I really need your help, please!

Thank you very much for this helpful lesson. Could someone from ENGVID add the quiz please? There is no quiz when I looked for it. Thanks.

Hi,James you are a very good teacher.From your lesson,I studied a lot and hope I will speak very fluintly.Thank you very much

Thanks you very much!!GOD BLESS YOU

Many thanks Mrs. Rebecca, It is a very interesting topic and it’s so helpful too. Warm Greetings from Perú.

thanks a lot

I got BA degree form peshawer university.

thank you so much rebecca

hi!Rebecca.Could you tell me what is formal way and informal way about the lesson above.

hi mrs rebecca , thank u for this lesson but iwanna know how can i talking about my studyy noww ?? i havent finished my study yet how can i talk about this thing? , thank u soooo

thank you very much Rebecca. so simple way to pass info. good luck. waiting for more.

Hi Rebecca, I liked this lesson, but I confess that I found a bit confussing.I’ll listen again.Thank you.Hugs from Brazil.

all ready i got it !! Thank Yooooooooooooooooooooou madam

iam very glad t wrch it en lessten !!

where quiz?

I would like to say thank you for that nice work whose EngVid Team has been done, giving us one great opportunity to learn English language.

the dearest Rebbeca, really you are perfect in teaching.would you please teach me about how to talk about going shopping for cosmetic or make up .with best regard sahar

hey there if anyone wanna respond i appreciate ……just watching those videos is not enough i guess so ….it wud be great if chattin options applicable …..sounds funny but it will really help everyone ….

hi i optained an M.A.in ENGLISH LITERATURE from DAVV university at indore in india ….now i am persuing M.PHIL.

Is it correct ?

Raina, It’s not “at India”, should be “in India”. good luck.

hi read it again dear i have written in india

thanks my teacher for your lesson :)

Could you tell me what means “MIT”.

MIT: Massachusetts Institute of Technology – a top notch college.

I have graduated from Pune university with b tech in agriculture engineering. is this right sentence Rebecca ?

Sandeep, Say “a” before B.Tech U want this one to be replied only by Rebecca? then ignore my post!

Nice & interesting way of teaching Rebecca!!

you’re a good teacher Rebecca. But I have a question. Why when we say she comes to visit tomrrow, we use s on the verb but when we say she will come to visit then we don’t use s on will? Thank you,

I m so glad by found out this site. teacher Rebeca your methodology is perfect and has contributed a lot for my learning.God Bless you

thank you rebecca the lesson helps me a lot with my interview

thanks for Rebecca you did a great job, I understood the way I narrate my educational qualification to the interviewer.

there is no quis for this lesson ? rep

Thankyou very much

Quiz is very helpful for learning but there is no quiz I think admin forgot.

thx for the video that’s verry interessting

Hello Miss Rebica I use my iPad and I dont find the exame that you talk about in your video.

Thank you very much

thanks about you are teaching i love all your leason .please can you give me one sentences about free time? mean some one ask me what you do in your free time all the week .

I would like to express of my gratefulness for you about the great advantages that I have acquired from your lessons rebecca, thanks for you and for EngVid.

Hey Rebeca! Thanks for your explanations, but where ís the appropriate test?

thank u a lot Ms.rebecca for this helpful lesson by the way i am interesting to improve my english language so if there is any one want to collaborate with me,don’t hesitate to send me an email to [email protected] thanks all

Dear Mrs.Rebecca Thank you very much, you are a good teacher, also thank for EngVid.

thanks for all

Thank you so mush Rebecca , your lessons are very interesting and i like your manner of teaching.

Hi, I am new to this EngVid, and so grateful knowing this site. It is really a help to improve my English. I love the way Rebecca conveys her lectures. I got the point without a second thought. Thank you so much!

thanks so much for your video.It’s helpful for me. Please make more video obout the question and answer tips for job interview.

I obtained BSc in Statistics from University of Salahaddin . Thanks teacher it is very necessary to knowledge , I have benefited from your lessons .

Dear Mrs. Rebecca, please in the case that i need to talk about an specialization in finances; how do you say? and in the case i want to talk about other courses with less time than an university

Rebecca… I’m from Brazil and your lessons help me a lot to improve my english. So, thanks for all.

i am from Sudan i want to learning English complete can u help me teacher Rebbecca to learn

Hi Rebecca. I’m Daniela, 25, from Romania. I am very glad to meet you through the videos and I appreciate your coming here to explain all this elementary rules.

I have a big problem with my English, because when somebody who speaks English is bring on me, i have a lot of emotions and i start to stammer out, means i am getting shy and say no words. How can I release that and speak fluecy in english, without fear?

Pls, help me with an advice. Now i’m telling my calification: I graduated from the University Of Bucharest with a Specialized Marketing in Sociology.

Hi Deniela i have the same problem :( i’m good at writing but i’m not good at pronunciation and in communication with people , I cannot easilly find the words when i speak with people in English and i’m getting shy too :(

İf there was a quiz related this topic , it’d be better. This is my example ; I’m 24 years old and graduated from faculty of economics and administrative sciences. I’ve been working as a financial & accounting manager.

Hi Reecca. This is a very interesting lesson. I don’t understand quite well this studies means: MBA = Master in Administration? BS = Superior Bachillor?? (is this like Occupational Superior Formation? MM = ?? Could you help me to indicate me which are the califications more commons in English?. For example: I have superior studies of professional administration and my speciality are laws. Could you advise me how I have to express properly my qualifications?. Thank you in advance. By the way … you expres very clear and I can undersant all you have say to us :) Thank you again.

This is a very interesting lesson.

This lesson is wonderfull. Thanks, Rebecca. I learn english easy with you

i can’t thank you both enough forever you’re a great teacher . rebecca

That’s a good lesson !

I graduated from King Saud University with a BSc in Pharmacy.

I have a BSc in Pharmacy from KSU.

this is very important lesson and i hope it would help me alot in the near fuure thanks barbere.

my name is moha and i speak the language fuently but my problem is i can,t create a simple pragraph. i would like to be a good writer, how i can reach my dream. please i need your help and advive serially!!

thanks so much ms Rebecca for this useful lesson,hope this will help me to describe myself at the bestway. i graduated from Azhar University with Bacholar in Economy. Sincerely

Dear Rebecca, I’m a Chinese in HK, I’m a new migrant in Austrlia and come over just 3 months ago, I have a problem is unable speak english fluently and I feel panic when local people talk to me that makes me cannot speak english properly. Could you please advise how to speak english properly ? Thanks !

I’m a Mexican Student. I enjoy your lessons pretty much. I always learn something new when watching your videos. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge.. You’re a great Teacher !!

i enjoy your lesson very much

thanks Rebeca for everythig

i really like your lessons.thank you very much.i want to speak english everyday.my skpye is hoangtubongdem0201.if someone want to practise english english,you can add my skype.we talk together.i want to make friend with a lot of people.thank you very much once again

Hi Rebecca CPA program is a program which is provided by CPA Australia to become a qualified accountant. The person will become a full CPA Australia member Can I say the following ways 1.I completed the CPA program from CPA Australia. 2. I graduated the CPA program from CPA Australia. 3. I am the full member of CPA Australia.

Oh great. thank you.

Thanks so much for your useful lessons you are my best teacher

I have an engineer diploma in Electrotachnique from CNAM

I graduated from CNAM with an engineer diploma in Electrotechnique

I obtained my master degree in industrial production from CNAM in 2010

Why in sentence ‘Olga complited an MA in PSYCH at Oxford University’ we use ‘at’ instead of ‘from’?

I didn’t understand which article should I use with degree (BA, MBA, etc.): ‘a/an’ or ‘the’?

Hi, Rebecca! I am from Kazakhstan. I have been wacthing your lessons. Most of videos were successful… I am glad what I am studying from You… My lot of thunks for you. I wish to you strong health and big happyness)))

It was very helpful lesson, than you Rebecca!

I have got a BA in finance from Economic University of HaNoi City. Of course, VietNam is my country.

Thanks to you,Ms.Rebecca,you are doing a very good job,and it has helped so many people, especially for us who learn English as second language. by the way, there is no quiz.

Very useful . . many thanks for that

Thank you very much Rebecca ..

That was a really useful lesson … :)

Thanks Rebecca … I’m going to graduate from Damascus university faculty of economics in two years away also I’m going to have cma from ima after graduation because it would be a great step in my jop trip and qualify me to get high income .

Congratulations, Rebecca! Your videos are very useful.

Marvelous………..Enjoy a lot.

thanks again, 8/8

Not bad Sasha. Keep up the good work!

See you around.

thankyou for nice lesson

Dear Rebecca, Lesson simple, clear and useful. Thanks. Best regards.

Good Lesseon, thanks Rebeca!

Hello teacher, thank you so much for the lesson. From the university of somewhere or from somewhere university, :) See you later.

Here my homework my dear Rebeca!

1-Julio graduated from the Universidad del Zulia with B.A in biology education. 2-Julio has a B.A in biology education from the Universidad del Zulia. 3-Julio obtained a B.A in biology education from the Universidad del Zulia. 4-Julio completed a B.A in biology education from the Universidad del Zulia.

If i have made some mistakes i would like to know about it!

Dear Rebecca, I would like to ask you something. My qualification is economist -faculty cater and hotel industry, majoring in marketing. How can I say it correctly? Thank you for your answer in advance.

Thank you so much Teacher REBECCA for your amazing lessons. MA God BLESS you a abundantly.

Thank you so much Teacher REBECCA for your amazing lessons. MAy God BLESS you a abundantly.

I have nothing to say more just but exhaustive material! Thank you veru much. It is very helpful.

it can also be said like

He/She has done an MBA from London University He/She earned an MBA from London University

Hi rebecca, I really like your lessons, I send you greetings from Mexico.

Thank you Rebecca for the lesson! Could you tell me, how can I say in English in my case: I got/have a Barchelor’s diploma in accounting from the University of Moscow I graduated from the University of Moscow with a Barchelor’s diploma in accounting Please correct me If I was mistaken

is that right sentence Ma’am ? “i am doing graduation from abc Univ with BS in English Literature & Linguistic”

Thank you so much.I would like to hear from you .Is it correct to say ” I am graduated from Galgotia’s College of Engineering and Technology with Computer Science & Engineering”.I require your assistance.

How can I get help to find a job.

I’m graduated from BATNA university with engineer’s degree in health and safety environment

You got 7 correct out of 8.

thank you…

thank you so much ma’am Rebecca.

Thank you Ms. Rebecca!

Am impressed with the questions

Very good and encouragement

Thank you, Rebeca. But Can you explain to me What does MSc represent? Please, answer me, it was a doubt that I have had for many years.

Thank you for the lesson. Could you please come up with a lesson based on elementary and high school grade?

Great Rebeca, tks!

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How to Write a Personal Statement for a Scholarship + Examples

What’s covered:, what is the purpose of the scholarship personal statement, what to include in your personal statement, personal statement example: breakdown + analysis, how to make sure your writing is effective.

Either before or after you’ve gotten into your dream school, you’ll have to figure out how to pay for it. For most students, this involves a combination of financial aid, parent contributions, self-contributions, student loans, and scholarships/grants. Because scholarships are money out of someone else’s pocket that you never have to pay back, they are a great place to start!

Scholarships come in two forms: merit-based and need-based. Need-based scholarships are also often called grants. These designations tell you whether an organization looks at your financial situation when deciding about your scholarship.

Additionally, different scholarships fall under different categories based on the mission of the organization or person providing the scholarship’s financing. These missions typically emphasize different things like academic achievement, specific career goals, community service, leadership, family background, skill in the arts, or having overcome hardship. As you select scholarships to apply for and complete your applications, you should keep these missions in mind.

No matter what type of scholarship you are applying for, you will be asked to provide the review committee with standard materials. This includes your transcript, GPA, and resume/extracurriculars, but also, importantly, your personal statement. A scholarship personal statement is a bit different from your normal college essay, so we’ve put together this guide and some examples to help you get started!

The purpose of your personal statement is to help a review committee learn more about your personality, values, goals, and what makes you special. Ultimately, like with your college essays, you are trying to humanize your profile beyond your transcript, GPA, and test scores.

College essays all have one goal in mind (which is why you can apply to multiple schools at once through applications like the Common App or Coalition App): convince admissions officers that you would be a valuable addition to the university environment. The goal of your scholarship personal statement is different and differs more from one scholarship to the next. Rather than convincing various review committees that you are a generally good candidate for extra funding for college, you need to convince each review committee that your values have historically aligned with their organization’s mission and will continue to align with their organization’s mission.

Common missions amongst those who give scholarships include:

Providing opportunities for students with career ambitions in a particular field
Helping students who have experienced unexpected hardship
Supporting students who show outstanding academic achievement
Funding the arts through investing in young artists with strong technical skill
Supporting the development of civic-minded community service leaders of the future
Providing opportunities for historically underrepresented ethnic communities

If a specific mission like this is outlined on an organization’s website or in the promotional material for its scholarship, the purpose of your personal statement is to show how you exemplify that mission.

Some scholarships ask for your personal statement to be guided by a prompt, while others leave things open for interpretation. When you are provided a prompt, it is obvious what you must do: answer the prompt. When you are not provided a prompt, you want to write a personal statement that is essentially a small-scale autobiography where you position yourself as a good investment. In either case, you should identify a focus or theme for what you are trying to say about yourself so that your application does not get lost in the shuffle.

Prompts include questions like:

Why do you deserve this scholarship?
How have you shown your commitment to (leadership/community service/diversity) in your community?
When did you overcome adversity?
Why is attending college important to you?

If you are provided a prompt, develop a theme for your response that showcases both your values and your achievements. This will help your essay feel focused and will subsequently help the review committee to remember which candidate you were as they deliberate.

Themes include things like:

I deserve this community service scholarship because my compassion for intergenerational trauma has inspired me to volunteer with a local after-school program. I didn’t just sympathize. I did something about my sympathy because that’s the type of person I am. Within the program, I have identified avenues for improvement and worked alongside full-time staff to develop new strategies for increasing attendance.
I overcame adversity when my mother had to have a major surgery two months after giving birth to my younger brother. I was just a kid but was thrown into a situation where I had to raise another kid. It was hard, but I’m the kind of person who tries to grow from hard times and, through my experience taking care of a baby, I learned the importance of listening to body language and nonverbal cues to understand the needs of others (baby and nonbaby, alike).

Without a prompt, clarity can be harder to achieve. That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values.

Types of goals include:

Career goals
Goals for personal growth
The type of friend you want to be
The change you want to make in the world

Values could include:

Authenticity
And many more!

After you write out your goals/values, write out your achievements to see what goals/values you have “proof” of your commitment to. Your essay will ultimately be an exploration of your goal/value, what you have done about your goal/value in the past, and what you aspire to in the future.

You might be tempted to reflect on areas for improvement, but scholarships care about you living out your values. It is not enough to aspire to be exemplary in leadership, community service, or your academic field. For scholarships, you have to already be exemplary.

Finally, keep in mind that the review committee likely already has a copy of your extracurricular activities and involvement. Pick one or two accomplishments, then strive for depth, not breadth as you explore them.

My interest in the field of neuroscience began at a young age. When I was twelve years old, my sister developed a condition called Pseudotumor Cerebri following multiple concussions during a basketball game. It took the doctors over six months to make a proper diagnosis, followed by three years of treatment before she recovered. During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions. Later, my love of neuroscience was amplified when my mother began to suffer from brain-related health issues. My mother had been a practicing attorney in Dallas for over twenty years. She was a determined litigator who relentlessly tried difficult cases that changed people’s lives. Now, she suffers from a cognitive impairment and is no longer able to practice law. Oftentimes, she has headaches, she gets “cloudy,” her executive functioning slows down, she feels overwhelmed, and she forgets things. My mother has gone from being the strong, confident, emotional and financial caretaker of our family to needing significant help on a daily basis. Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.

Due to my experiences with my mother and sister when I was in middle school, I knew that I wanted to make a difference in the field of neuroscience. I also knew that, to obtain this goal, I needed to maintain superior grades in school while also pursuing opportunities outside of school to further my education. In school, I was able to maintain superior grades to the point where I am currently valedictorian in a class of 567 students. In addition, in school, I challenged myself by taking 16 Advanced Placement classes and 19 Honors classes. Two of the most beneficial classes were AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research. AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research are research-oriented classes where students are given the opportunity to pursue whatever track their research takes them down. As a junior in AP Capstone Seminar, I researched the effects of harmful pesticide use on the prevalence of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in children. This year, as a senior in AP Capstone Research, I am learning about the effects of medical marijuana on the treatment of Multiple Sclerosis (MS).

Outside of school, I furthered my education through taking advantage of the Duke TiP summer program. Duke TiP is a summer program run by Duke University where students who score extremely well on the SAT as middle schoolers are able to take college classes at different universities throughout the summers of their middle school and high school years. I took advantage of this opportunity twice. First, I went to Trinity University in San Antonio to expand my horizons and learn more about debate. However, once I was done exploring, I decided I wanted to go into neuroscience. This led me to take an Abnormal Psychology class at Duke University’s West Campus. This class opened my eyes to the interaction between neuroscience and mental health, mental illness, and personality. Years later, I am currently continuing my education outside of school as an intern at the University of Texas Dallas Center for Brain Health. Through this internship, I have been able to see different aspects of neuroscience including brain pattern testing, virtual reality therapy, and longitudinal research studies. With this background, I have positioned myself to be accepted by top neuroscience programs throughout the nation. So far, I have been accepted to the neuroscience department of University of Southern California, the University of Virginia, the University of Texas, and Southern Methodist University, as well as the chemistry department at University of North Carolina–Chapel Hill.

It is with this passion for neuroscience driven by my family and passion for education driven by internal motivation that I will set out to conquer my career objectives. My educational aspirations consist of acquiring a bachelor’s degree in a biological or health science that would assist me in pursuing a medical career as a neuroscience researcher. I decided to attain a career as a researcher since my passion has always been assisting others and trying to improve their quality of life. After obtaining my Masters and my PhD, I plan to become a professor at a prestigious university and continue performing lab research on cognitive disorders. I am particularly interested in disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). In the lab, I hope to find different therapies and medications to help treat the 3.5 million people around the world suffering from ASD. Furthermore, I want to contribute back to underserved populations that struggle because they do not have as much access to medical assistance as other privileged groups. As such, I hope to do a part of my research in less developed or developing Spanish-speaking countries. This will also allow me to pursue my love of Spanish while pursuing my love of neuroscience. I think that following such a career path will provide me the opportunity to learn about the medical needs of the autistic community and improve their quality of health. Furthermore, I hope to train a new generation of students to strive to research and make comparable discoveries. Whether it be through virtual reality labs or new drug discoveries, I believe that research leads to innovation which leads to a brighter future.

This student does a great job of making themself appear competent and dedicated to the field of neuroscience. This is primarily because they provided tangible evidence of how they have pursued their dedication in the past—through their AP Capstone courses, their Abnormal Psychology class at Duke TiP, and their internship at UTD. There is no doubt in the mind of a reader that this student is high-achieving.

This student also engages successfully with a past-future trajectory, where they end with a vision of how they will continue to use neuroscience in the future. This helps the review committee see what they are investing in and the ways that their money will go to good use.

This student has two major areas for improvement. As we have said, the purpose of a personal statement is for a student to humanize themself to a review committee. This student struggles to depict themself separately from their academic achievements. A solution to this would be for the student to establish a theme towards the beginning of their essay that relates to both their values as a human and their achievements.

At the beginning of the essay, the student explores how their interest in neuroscience began. They explain their interest through the following sentences: “During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions” and “Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.” The student made the great decision to tell the backstory of their interest, but they described their research in very mundane and redundant terms. Instead, they could have focused on their value of intellectual curiosity as a magnetic force that encouraged them to research their mother and sister’s ailments. Curiosity, then, could serve as a value-related thematic throughline to taking AP Capstone classes, taking college courses during the summer that weren’t required, and interning before even graduating high school.

A second area for improvement would be avoiding statistics. As the student identifies their valedictorian status and the number of AP classes they have taken, they might turn away certain personalities on a review committee by appearing braggy. Even further, these statistics are a waste of space. The review committee already has access to this information. These words distract from the major theme of the essay and would have been better used to humanize the student.

Throughout my academic career, I have been an avid scholar, constantly pushing myself towards ambitious goals. I held and continue to hold myself to a high standard, enrolling myself in rigorous curriculum, including Honors and Advanced Placement courses to stretch my mental potential. During my junior year of high school, I took four AP tests, two on the same day, and earned the AP Scholar with Honor Award. Additionally, I received the Letter of Commendation for the PSAT/NMSQT, and qualified for Rotary Top 100 Students both my freshman and senior year, a sign of my commitment to my studies. However, school has not been all about having the best GPA for me; beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem. I always give each class my best effort and try my hardest on every assignment. My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result. It is a major goal of mine to continue to aspire towards a high level of achievement regarding future educational and occupational endeavors; I plan on continuing this level of dedication throughout my educational career and implementing the skills I have learned and will learn into my college experience and beyond.

This fall, I will begin attending the University of California Los Angeles as an English major. I chose this major because I am fascinated by written language, especially its ability to convey powerful messages and emotions. I also enjoy delving into the works of other authors to analyze specific components of their writing to discover the meaning behind their words. In particular, I cannot wait to begin in-depth literary criticism and learn new stylistic techniques to add more depth to my writing. Furthermore, I recently went to UCLA’s Bruin Day, an event for incoming freshmen, where I was exposed to many different extracurriculars, some of which really piqued my interest. I plan on joining the Writing Success Program, where I can help students receive free writing help, and Mock Trial, where I can debate issues with peers in front of a real judge. The latter, combined with a strong writing background from my undergraduate English studies will be extremely beneficial because I plan to apply to law school after my undergraduate degree. As of now, my career goal is to become a civil rights lawyer, to stand up for those who are discriminated against and protect minority groups to proliferate equality.

As a lawyer, I wish to utilize legislation to ameliorate the plight of the millions of Americans who feel prejudice and help them receive equity in the workplace, society, and so on. Though this seems a daunting task, I feel that my work ethic and past experience will give me the jumpstart I need to establish myself as a successful lawyer and give a voice to those who are often unheard in today’s legal system. I have been a Girl Scout for over a decade and continually participate in community service for the homeless, elderly, veterans, and more. My most recent project was the Gold Award, which I conducted in the Fullerton School District. I facilitated over ten workshops where junior high students taught elementary pupils STEM principles such as density and aerodynamics via creative activities like building aluminum boats and paper airplanes. I also work at Kumon, a tutoring center, where I teach students to advance their academic success. I love my job, and helping students from local schools reach their potential fills me with much pride.

Both being a Girl Scout and working at Kumon have inspired me to help those in need, contributing significantly to my desire to become a lawyer and aid others. My extracurriculars have allowed me to gain a new perspective on both learning and teaching, and have solidified my will to help the less fortunate. In college, I hope to continue to gain knowledge and further develop my leadership skills, amassing qualities that will help me assist others. I plan to join multiple community service clubs, such as UCLA’s local outreach programs that directly aid residents of Los Angeles. I want to help my fellow pupils as well, and plan on volunteering at peer tutoring and peer editing programs on campus. After college, during my career, I want to use legal tactics to assist the underdog and take a chance on those who are often overlooked for opportunities. I wish to represent those that are scared to seek out help or cannot afford it. Rather than battling conflict with additional conflict, I want to implement peaceful but strong, efficient tactics that will help make my state, country, and eventually the world more welcoming to people of all ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds. These goals are close to my heart and therefore I will be as diligent as I am passionate about them. My perseverance and love for learning and community service drive my ambition in both education and life as a whole, and the drive to make the world a better place is one that I will carry with me for my entire life.

This student emphasizes two values in this essay: hard work and community service. These are values that go together nicely, and definitely make sense with this student’s end goal of becoming a civil rights lawyer! That said, some changes could be made to the way the student presents their values that would make their personal statement more convincing and engaging.

Structurally, instead of using a past-future trajectory, this student starts by explaining their academic achievements, then explains their career goals, then explains their history of community service, then explains their future desires for community service. This structure loses the reader. Instead, the student should have started with either the past or the future.

This could look like 1) identifying their career goals, 2) explaining that hard work and a commitment to community service are necessary to get there, and 3) explaining that they aren’t worried because of their past commitment to hard work and community service. Or it could look like 1) providing examples of their hard work and community service in the past, then 2) explaining how those values will help them achieve their career goals.

Additionally, like with our other example, this student shows a heavy investment in statistics and spouting off accomplishments. This can be unappealing. Unfortunately, even when the student recognizes that they are doing this, writing “beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem,” they continue on to cite their achievements, writing “My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result.” They say they are going beyond the numbers, but they don’t go beyond the awards. They don’t look inward. One way to fix this would be to make community service the theme around which the essay operates, supplementing with statistics in ways that advance the image of the student as dedicated to community service.

Finally, this student would be more successful if they varied their sentence structure. While a small-scale autobiography can be good, if organized, every sentence should not begin with ‘I.’ The essay still needs to be engaging or the review committee might stop reading.

Feedback is ultimately any writer’s best source of improvement! To get your personal statement edited for free, use our Peer Review Essay Tool . With this tool, other students can tell you if your scholarship essay is effective and help you improve your essay so that you can have the best chances of gaining those extra funds!

Choose Your Test

Sat / act prep online guides and tips, 177 college essay examples for 11 schools + expert analysis.

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Want to write the perfect college application essay? Get professional help from PrepScholar.

Your dedicated PrepScholar Admissions counselor will craft your perfect college essay, from the ground up. We'll learn your background and interests, brainstorm essay topics, and walk you through the essay drafting process, step-by-step. At the end, you'll have a unique essay that you'll proudly submit to your top choice colleges.

Don't leave your college application to chance. Find out more about PrepScholar Admissions now :

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts.

Connecticut college.

12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
10 Harvard essays from 2023
10 Harvard essays from 2022
10 Harvard essays from 2021
10 Harvard essays from 2020
10 Harvard essays from 2019
10 Harvard essays from 2018
6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

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Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.” The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings . If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale. If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points? We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download it for free now:

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Knowledge Base

The Beginner's Guide to Writing an Essay | Steps & Examples

An academic essay is a focused piece of writing that develops an idea or argument using evidence, analysis, and interpretation.

There are many types of essays you might write as a student. The content and length of an essay depends on your level, subject of study, and course requirements. However, most essays at university level are argumentative — they aim to persuade the reader of a particular position or perspective on a topic.

The essay writing process consists of three main stages:

Preparation: Decide on your topic, do your research, and create an essay outline.
Writing : Set out your argument in the introduction, develop it with evidence in the main body, and wrap it up with a conclusion.
Revision: Check your essay on the content, organization, grammar, spelling, and formatting of your essay.

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Essay writing process, preparation for writing an essay, writing the introduction, writing the main body, writing the conclusion, essay checklist, lecture slides, frequently asked questions about writing an essay.

The writing process of preparation, writing, and revisions applies to every essay or paper, but the time and effort spent on each stage depends on the type of essay .

For example, if you’ve been assigned a five-paragraph expository essay for a high school class, you’ll probably spend the most time on the writing stage; for a college-level argumentative essay , on the other hand, you’ll need to spend more time researching your topic and developing an original argument before you start writing.

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Before you start writing, you should make sure you have a clear idea of what you want to say and how you’re going to say it. There are a few key steps you can follow to make sure you’re prepared:

Understand your assignment: What is the goal of this essay? What is the length and deadline of the assignment? Is there anything you need to clarify with your teacher or professor?
Define a topic: If you’re allowed to choose your own topic , try to pick something that you already know a bit about and that will hold your interest.
Do your research: Read primary and secondary sources and take notes to help you work out your position and angle on the topic. You’ll use these as evidence for your points.
Come up with a thesis: The thesis is the central point or argument that you want to make. A clear thesis is essential for a focused essay—you should keep referring back to it as you write.
Create an outline: Map out the rough structure of your essay in an outline . This makes it easier to start writing and keeps you on track as you go.

Once you’ve got a clear idea of what you want to discuss, in what order, and what evidence you’ll use, you’re ready to start writing.

The introduction sets the tone for your essay. It should grab the reader’s interest and inform them of what to expect. The introduction generally comprises 10–20% of the text.

1. Hook your reader

The first sentence of the introduction should pique your reader’s interest and curiosity. This sentence is sometimes called the hook. It might be an intriguing question, a surprising fact, or a bold statement emphasizing the relevance of the topic.

Let’s say we’re writing an essay about the development of Braille (the raised-dot reading and writing system used by visually impaired people). Our hook can make a strong statement about the topic:

The invention of Braille was a major turning point in the history of disability.

2. Provide background on your topic

Next, it’s important to give context that will help your reader understand your argument. This might involve providing background information, giving an overview of important academic work or debates on the topic, and explaining difficult terms. Don’t provide too much detail in the introduction—you can elaborate in the body of your essay.

3. Present the thesis statement

Next, you should formulate your thesis statement— the central argument you’re going to make. The thesis statement provides focus and signals your position on the topic. It is usually one or two sentences long. The thesis statement for our essay on Braille could look like this:

As the first writing system designed for blind people’s needs, Braille was a groundbreaking new accessibility tool. It not only provided practical benefits, but also helped change the cultural status of blindness.

4. Map the structure

In longer essays, you can end the introduction by briefly describing what will be covered in each part of the essay. This guides the reader through your structure and gives a preview of how your argument will develop.

The invention of Braille marked a major turning point in the history of disability. The writing system of raised dots used by blind and visually impaired people was developed by Louis Braille in nineteenth-century France. In a society that did not value disabled people in general, blindness was particularly stigmatized, and lack of access to reading and writing was a significant barrier to social participation. The idea of tactile reading was not entirely new, but existing methods based on sighted systems were difficult to learn and use. As the first writing system designed for blind people’s needs, Braille was a groundbreaking new accessibility tool. It not only provided practical benefits, but also helped change the cultural status of blindness. This essay begins by discussing the situation of blind people in nineteenth-century Europe. It then describes the invention of Braille and the gradual process of its acceptance within blind education. Subsequently, it explores the wide-ranging effects of this invention on blind people’s social and cultural lives.

Write your essay introduction

The body of your essay is where you make arguments supporting your thesis, provide evidence, and develop your ideas. Its purpose is to present, interpret, and analyze the information and sources you have gathered to support your argument.

Length of the body text

The length of the body depends on the type of essay. On average, the body comprises 60–80% of your essay. For a high school essay, this could be just three paragraphs, but for a graduate school essay of 6,000 words, the body could take up 8–10 pages.

Paragraph structure

To give your essay a clear structure , it is important to organize it into paragraphs . Each paragraph should be centered around one main point or idea.

That idea is introduced in a topic sentence . The topic sentence should generally lead on from the previous paragraph and introduce the point to be made in this paragraph. Transition words can be used to create clear connections between sentences.

After the topic sentence, present evidence such as data, examples, or quotes from relevant sources. Be sure to interpret and explain the evidence, and show how it helps develop your overall argument.

Lack of access to reading and writing put blind people at a serious disadvantage in nineteenth-century society. Text was one of the primary methods through which people engaged with culture, communicated with others, and accessed information; without a well-developed reading system that did not rely on sight, blind people were excluded from social participation (Weygand, 2009). While disabled people in general suffered from discrimination, blindness was widely viewed as the worst disability, and it was commonly believed that blind people were incapable of pursuing a profession or improving themselves through culture (Weygand, 2009). This demonstrates the importance of reading and writing to social status at the time: without access to text, it was considered impossible to fully participate in society. Blind people were excluded from the sighted world, but also entirely dependent on sighted people for information and education.

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The conclusion is the final paragraph of an essay. It should generally take up no more than 10–15% of the text . A strong essay conclusion :

Returns to your thesis
Ties together your main points
Shows why your argument matters

A great conclusion should finish with a memorable or impactful sentence that leaves the reader with a strong final impression.

What not to include in a conclusion

To make your essay’s conclusion as strong as possible, there are a few things you should avoid. The most common mistakes are:

Including new arguments or evidence
Undermining your arguments (e.g. “This is just one approach of many”)
Using concluding phrases like “To sum up…” or “In conclusion…”

Braille paved the way for dramatic cultural changes in the way blind people were treated and the opportunities available to them. Louis Braille’s innovation was to reimagine existing reading systems from a blind perspective, and the success of this invention required sighted teachers to adapt to their students’ reality instead of the other way around. In this sense, Braille helped drive broader social changes in the status of blindness. New accessibility tools provide practical advantages to those who need them, but they can also change the perspectives and attitudes of those who do not.

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Checklist: Essay

My essay follows the requirements of the assignment (topic and length ).

My introduction sparks the reader’s interest and provides any necessary background information on the topic.

My introduction contains a thesis statement that states the focus and position of the essay.

I use paragraphs to structure the essay.

I use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph.

Each paragraph has a single focus and a clear connection to the thesis statement.

I make clear transitions between paragraphs and ideas.

My conclusion doesn’t just repeat my points, but draws connections between arguments.

I don’t introduce new arguments or evidence in the conclusion.

I have given an in-text citation for every quote or piece of information I got from another source.

I have included a reference page at the end of my essay, listing full details of all my sources.

My citations and references are correctly formatted according to the required citation style .

My essay has an interesting and informative title.

I have followed all formatting guidelines (e.g. font, page numbers, line spacing).

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Essay: The importance of academic qualifications

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In many countries, education is being considered the step towards success, but in some countries it might need social skills and computer skills before applying to the jobs. In a developed, modern society in particular, it is essential to have some sort of academic qualification, as this is the first thing potential employers will look at. Academic qualifications are the only easy and reliable way to find an efficient, dependable employee. Therefore, ‘an academic qualification ensures a successful career’. This is because firstly, academic qualifications provide more alternatives to avail career promotion; secondly, an academic qualification ensures success in life by getting a good job. In that case, they usually have determination on solving concerns and fascinating new knowledge which can sustain encouragement and job achievements, the most essential part to develop a successful career. Academic qualifications can boost the professional career by providing more career options and wealth of opportunities. Because, academic qualification is the evidence of the possession of knowledge and experience. Academic qualifiers usually have problem solving skills which helps them in achieving prominent positions. Firstly, academic qualifications can encourage having more knowledge and problem solving skills, to exhibit their potential in order to avail career promotions. According to Hegarty & Walsh (2011, pp 480-482), that a better qualification can help one to gain more knowledge for the professional development and building critical thinking model. In addition to that it will equip them with confidence and motivation to gain scientific training and compete to higher position. It is obvious from this evidence that academic qualification is important not only because of have a plenty of knowledge but it can also provide you with additional benefits for career promotion. Secondly, academic qualification can hand over specific skills which are necessary for professional promotion. According to the research C Clark (2013,pp 227-231), the possible professional promotion depend upon good deal of condition, along with the specific qualifications and also other meaningful character which can be anticipated during the growth and gaining the formal qualification such as administrative qualities, social and associate skills. This evidence shows that to contend for a professional promotion, the importance of academic qualification may not be avoided, for those who have satisfied the qualification requirements, they have already accomplished how to gain better performance on common skill and academic discussion, and therefore they have more opportunity to earn career promotion. Over all, academic qualification enables to play the vital roles of an organization resulting in the career’s success and satisfaction. Academic qualification is thought as a road to success in life as it privileges with inter-disciplinary skills which makes a strong and distinguished candidates to achieve a prominent position. More academic qualification expands and widen mind horizon in a specific field of study which result in having a strong hold and command over that field. Based on number of studies it is obvious that there is in inter-relationship between the academic levels acquired and objective career success (Dierendock Dv & Gaast ED, pp 695), Academic Qualification ensures success in life by getting a good job and getting paid well. Academic qualifications displays that a person has the basics in learning. If their basic grounding in Math, Science and Language is strong, then one can get success in life because mastering these subjects allows a person to calculate, to innovate and to communicate. These essentials for success cannot be learned without professional help like in schools and colleges. In order to prove that someone has acquired this knowledge, one is tested. If a person’s learning is satisfactory, then they are given a certificate to indicate their competence as an academic qualification. These are the necessary things to get a good, very well paid job or career, so this is obvious that academic qualification plays a major contributing role in building y the career by securing a good and healthy job. In short, academic qualification is the pre-requisite to ensure success in life by seeking a good and reliable job. In conclusion, academic qualification is an essential requirement of a progressive and developing career which provides many opportunities to get promotions and effectively build the career. Moreover, academic qualification guarantees a prosperous and successful life by securing a good job and attractive salary packages. Therefore academic qualification is of sole importance to be ahead of all in the race of life. So for retaining a unique position, advancing career, reliable designation and better source of income academic qualification is the key factor for availing all the benefits associated with it. That is why it is necessary for everyone to acquire more and more knowledge, skills and concepts while mastering and qualifying the highest possible levels of qualification in their specific fields of knowledge and research, which will lead to progression, development and innovation. References Dierendonck DV & Gaast EVD, 2013,’Goal orientation, academic competences and early career success’, career development international, Vol 18 pp.694-711

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Scholarship Essay Writing

Scholarship Essay Examples

Winning Scholarship Essay Examples for Students: Tips Included

37 min read

Published on: Mar 14, 2021

Last updated on: Jan 31, 2024

Scholarship Essay Examples Financial Need

Why this scholarship essay worked.

This scholarship essay example effectively conveys the applicant's financial need and their determination to overcome the challenges associated with it. Here's why this essay worked:

Personal Storytelling: The essay begins with a personal anecdote that establishes a connection between the applicant's background and financial constraints. This helps create empathy and demonstrates the genuine impact of financial challenges on their educational journey.
Resilience and Resourcefulness: The applicant showcases their resilience and resourcefulness in navigating financial hardships. They highlight their proactive approach to seeking part-time employment and actively pursuing scholarships.
Academic Commitment: Despite the financial strain, the applicant emphasizes their commitment to academic excellence by maintaining a high GPA. This showcases their dedication and ability to prioritize their studies amidst challenging circumstances.
Community Involvement : The essay also highlights the applicant's involvement in community service. This demonstrates their desire to give back and make a positive impact.
Connection to Scholarship: The applicant clearly articulates how receiving the scholarship would benefit them. This demonstrates a strong alignment between their goals and the purpose of the scholarship.

Want more examples, check out these winning scholarship essay examples.

Financial Aid Scholarship Essay

Scholarship Essay for Financial Need

Scholarship Essay Examples About Yourself

Why this essay worked.

This scholarship essay worked for several reasons, such as:

It effectively showcases the applicant's passion for mathematics, community engagement, and resilience.
It compellingly conveyed the applicant's dedication, ambition, and potential for making a positive impact. This makes them a deserving candidate for the scholarship.
Clear connection to the scholarship's goals and how it would further the applicant's educational journey and impact.

Here are some scholarship essay examples about yourself; get an idea from them, and create a successful essay.

Scholarship Essay Example About Yourself

Scholarship Essay About Yourself

Scholarship Essay Examples for Nursing

Why this essay worked.

This essay worked due to its compelling portrayal of the applicant's genuine passion for nursing, coupled with their unwavering dedication to making a positive impact in patient care.

The essay effectively demonstrates the applicant's well-rounded preparation for a nursing career and their clear alignment with the goals and mission of the scholarship, making them a strong candidate for consideration.

Below are some more examples of scholarship essays for nursing.

Nursing Scholarship Essay

Scholarship Essay for Nursing

Scholarship Essay Examples About Career Goals

This essay worked for the following reasons:

Clear and Specific Career Goals: The essay effectively outlines the applicant's career goal of becoming a clinical psychologist specializing in mental health support. The clarity and specificity of the goal demonstrate a well-defined path and a strong sense of purpose.
Demonstrated Preparation and Commitment: The essay showcases the applicant's comprehensive preparation for their career goals. It also demonstrates their readiness and dedication to excel in the field.
Alignment with Scholarship Objectives: The essay effectively highlights how the scholarship will contribute to the applicant's career aspirations. This includes attending conferences, workshops, and advanced training programs.

If you find difficulty writing the scholarship essay about career goals, get help from the below-mentioned examples, and submit a well-written essay.

Scholarship Essay Examples About Leadership

Three reasons why this essay worked are:

Demonstrated Leadership Experience : This essay effectively highlights the applicant's practical experience in leadership roles, showcasing their ability to lead teams, organize events, and coordinate volunteers.
Commitment to Personal Growth : The essay demonstrates the applicant's proactive approach to leadership development by seeking formal training and participating in workshops focused on honing their skills.
Emphasis on Collaboration and Empowerment: The essay emphasizes the applicant's belief in collaborative leadership. It promotes inclusivity and empowers team members to contribute their unique perspectives.

Here we gather some good scholarship essay examples about leadership that help in your writing.

Leadership Scholarship Essay Example

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Scholarship Essay Examples About Community Service

Here are the reasons:

Genuine Passion and Commitment: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's genuine passion for community service, highlighting their long-standing involvement and the transformative impact it has had on their life.
Integration of Service with Education: The essay demonstrates the applicant's proactive approach to integrating their passion for community service with their educational pursuits.
Aspiration for Social Change: The essay goes beyond personal experiences and highlights the applicant's aspirations for broader social change.

Here is an excellent community service scholarship essa y that can help you write for community college.

Scholarship Essay Example about Community Service

High School Scholarship Essay Examples

Clear and Convincing Goals: The essay effectively communicates the applicant's strong desire to pursue higher education despite financial constraints.
Demonstrated Leadership and Well-Roundedness: The essay showcases the applicant's involvement in extracurricular activities. It highlights their ability to balance academic responsibilities with active participation in clubs, sports teams, and community service initiatives.
Emphasis on Giving Back and Community Engagement: The essay not only focuses on the applicant's personal aspirations but also highlights their commitment to giving back to their community.

The following are the best high school scholarship essay examples, use this for your help, and write an attention-grabbing essay.

Scholarship Essay Example for High School

Scholarship Essay for High School

Scholarship Essay Examples for University

Why this essay works.

Three reasons why this essay works are:

Strong Personal Motivation: The essay effectively communicates the applicant's unwavering commitment and determination to pursue a university education.
Articulation of Long-Term Goals and Social Impact: The essay goes beyond highlighting the applicant's academic achievements and financial needs. It emphasizes the applicant's desire to contribute to their community and make a positive impact on society.
The connection between Scholarship and Applicant's Potential: The essay effectively illustrates how receiving the scholarship would directly address the financial burden. Plus, it will enable the applicant to fully embrace the university experience.

Here are some excellent scholarship essay examples for university students that help you in writing the essay.

Scholarship Essay Example for University Students

Scholarship Essay Examples for Engineering

This essay worked because of the following reasons:

Passion and Commitment: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's deep passion for engineering. It also shows their genuine commitment to making a positive impact in this field.
Alignment with Scholarship Objectives: It clearly establishes the connection between the scholarship and the applicant's goals in engineering.
Future Impact and Growth: It also communicates the applicant's aspiration to contribute to the field of engineering and make a positive difference in the world.

The following is another scholarship essay example that can help you in creating the perfect essay on your own.

Scholarship Essay Examples for Masters

This essay worked for several reasons:

Clear Purpose and Goal: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's clear purpose and goal of pursuing a master's degree. It highlights the transformative impact that a master's degree can have on personal and professional growth.
Financial Need and Scholarship Alignment : The essay addresses the financial challenges associated with pursuing a master's degree. It demonstrates the direct alignment between the scholarship and the applicant's needs.
Impact and Giving Back : The essay goes beyond personal aspirations and emphasizes the applicant's intention to make a broader impact on their community and society.

Here is an example that you can use as a guide and write a perfect scholarship essay.

Why Should You Receive this Scholarship Essay Examples

Three brief reasons why this essay worked are:

Clear and Convincing Arguments : The essay presents concise and compelling arguments to support the applicant's case for receiving the scholarship.
Personal Connection : It demonstrates how receiving the scholarship would directly impact the applicant's academic journey
Gratitude and Future Commitment : It expresses sincere gratitude for the opportunity and emphasizes the applicant's commitment to making the most of the scholarship.

Here is an example, take help from them for your scholarship essay.

Why Should You Receive this Scholarship Essay Example

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Examples

Compelling Personal Story: The essay effectively presents the applicant's personal story and highlights their dedication and commitment to their education
Addressing Academic Excellence and Financial Need : The essay successfully addresses both academic excellence and financial need, which are two crucial aspects considered by scholarship committees.
Commitment to Making an Impact: The essay goes beyond the applicant's personal goals and emphasizes their dedication to making a positive impact in their community.

Hereâs another example for this scholarship essay below:

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Example

Tips for Writing the Effective Scholarship Essay

When it comes to writing an effective scholarship essay, there are several key tips to keep in mind.

By following these guidelines, you can maximize your chances of standing out and impressing scholarship selection committees.

Here are some essential tips to help you craft a compelling scholarship essay:

Understand the Prompt

Take the time to thoroughly understand the essay prompt or topic provided by the scholarship provider. Pay attention to any specific instructions or guidelines given.

Research the Scholarship

Familiarize yourself with the organization or institution offering the scholarship. Understand their values, mission, and objectives. This knowledge will help you align your essay with their goals and demonstrate your fit for the scholarship.

Tell Your Unique Story

Use the essay as an opportunity to showcase your personal experiences, like obstacles you might encounter, achievements, and aspirations. Highlight what sets you apart from other applicants. Be authentic and genuine in conveying your story, like overcoming personal failures.

Start with a Compelling Introduction

Grab the reader's attention from the beginning with a strong and captivating introduction. Consider starting with a compelling anecdote, a thought-provoking question, or a powerful statement.

Structure Your Essay

Organize your essay into a clear and logical structure. Start with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs that support your main points, and end with a concise and impactful conclusion.

Be Concise and Specific

Scholarship essays often have a word or character limits, so make every word count. Be concise in your writing and avoid unnecessary fluff. Focus on providing specific examples and details that support your claims.

Showcase Your Achievements

Highlight your academic accomplishments, extracurricular involvements, community service, leadership roles, or any other relevant achievements. Link them to the values and goals of the scholarship.

Address the Selection Criteria

Ensure that your essay addresses the selection criteria specified by the scholarship provider. If they are looking for specific qualities or skills, tailor your essay to showcase how you possess those attributes.

In conclusion, writing an effective scholarship essay is a crucial step in securing the financial aid you need for your education.

By following the tips outlined here, you can enhance your essay-writing skills and create a compelling narrative that captivates scholarship selection committees.

Be authentic, concise, and specific in your writing. Tailor your essay to align with the values and objectives of the scholarship provider. And above all, believe in yourself and your potential to make a difference through education.

If you're seeking further guidance and support in your scholarship essay writing journey, consider partnering with our AI essay writing tools !

We also have a team of experienced and professional essay writers who can provide personal essay writing service with valuable insights.

Hire our college paper writing service today and take the next step towards securing the financial aid you deserve.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Personal Statement — Educational Background

My Motivation to Study Transportation Engineering

Categories: Academic Interests Personal Statement Plans After High School

About this sample

Words: 1952 |

10 min read

Published: Jul 10, 2019

Words: 1952 | Pages: 3 | 10 min read

Educational background example, why transportation engineering, undergraduate studies, my personality, works cited:.

Boon, K., & Powell, C. (2009). The kids are not all right: The United States and the Convention on the Rights of the Child. Human Rights Quarterly, 31(1), 149-184.
Coble, C. (2022). How the juvenile justice system works. FindLaw. https://www.findlaw.com/criminal/criminal-law-basics/how-the-juvenile-justice-system-works.html
Dieter, R. C. (2016). Juveniles and the death penalty. Death Penalty Information Center.
Domanick, J. (2019). Cruel and unusual punishment: The shame of three strikes laws. The Crime Report. https://thecrimereport.org/2019/10/21/cruel-and-unusual-punishment-the-shame-of-three-strikes-laws/
Gonzalez, J. (2017). The impact of Prop 57 on California’s criminal justice system. ACLU of Northern California.
National Conference of State Legislatures. (2021). Juvenile sentencing.
National Institute of Justice. (2016). Reducing juvenile recidivism. CrimeSolutions.gov. https://www.crimesolutions.gov/practice-details/Reducing-Juvenile-Recidivism
They Call Us Monsters. (2017). [Documentary]. Ben Lear (Director). Netflix.
Nellis, A. (2021). When juveniles are tried in adult criminal court. The Sentencing Project.
Proposition 57: California parole for non-violent criminals and juvenile court trial requirements (2016). (2023). Ballotpedia.

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Scholarship Essay Writing

Scholarship Essay Examples

12 Winning Scholarship Essay Examples for Aspiring Students

18 min read

Financial Need Scholarship Essay Example for College

Students often apply for financial assistance scholarships for their college education. Such scholarships require you to provide compelling reasons as to why you deserve financial aid.

Here is an example that successfully caters to this question:

Why This Scholarship Essay Succeeded

This scholarship essay effectively conveys the applicant's financial need while also highlighting their determination and commitment to education. Here are some key elements that contributed to its success:

Personal Story: The essay starts with a personal story about growing up in a single-parent household, providing context for the financial need. This makes the essay relatable and emotionally engaging.
Specific Financial Challenges: The essay details the specific financial challenges the applicant faces, such as tuition, textbooks, and living expenses. Specificity adds credibility to the financial need.
Explains the Significance of the Scholarship for Education: The essay explains how receiving the scholarship would positively impact the applicant's education, allowing them to focus more on studies and extracurricular activities.

Leadership Scholarship Essay Examples

When applying to programs for training young leaders, they often require you to write an essay. Here is a leadership scholarship essay sample:

Why This Scholarship Essay Worked

This leadership scholarship essay effectively showcases the applicant's leadership journey, growth, and suitability for the scholarship. Here are some key elements that contributed to its success:

Personal Growth: The essay highlights the applicant's personal growth and development through their leadership experiences, demonstrating a clear understanding of what leadership entails.
Specific Examples: The applicant provides specific examples of challenges faced and initiatives undertaken as a leader, adding credibility to their claims.
Lessons Learned: The essay discusses the lessons learned, emphasizing qualities such as communication, teamwork, and empathy, which are essential for effective leadership.
Alignment with Scholarship: The essay explains how the scholarship will support the applicant's continued leadership growth and commitment to making a positive impact.

Scholarship Essay Example for Engineering

Engineering schools have a strong vetting process to ensure that they only let in serious students. Writing a scholarship essay is their way of judging a student’s interests and capabilities.

Check out this catchy sample:

Why this Engineering Scholarship Essay Worked

Here are some key elements that contributed to the essay’s success:

Passion and Dedication: The essay clearly communicates the applicant's deep passion for engineering, emphasizing their lifelong commitment to the field.
Specific Examples: The applicant provides specific examples of their experiences in engineering, such as the cooling system project and the sustainable housing initiative, demonstrating their practical application of engineering skills.
Financial Need: The essay briefly touches upon the financial challenges faced by the applicant, which adds context to their need for financial support.
Impact and Contribution: The essay discusses how receiving the scholarship will enable the applicant to focus more on their studies and research projects, emphasizing their desire to contribute meaningfully to the field of engineering.

Nursing Scholarship Essay Example

Nursing institutions require hard-working and committed pupils. That’s why the scholarship essay is an essential part of their application process.

So, what does a good nursing scholarship essay look like? Here’s an example:

Why This Nursing Scholarship Essay Succeeded

This nursing scholarship essay effectively conveys the applicant's passion for nursing and their commitment to patient-centered care. Here are some key elements that contributed to its success:

Passion for Nursing: The essay clearly communicates the applicant's passion for nursing, emphasizing personal experiences that ignited this passion.
Continuous Learning: The essay highlights the applicant's commitment to ongoing learning and professional growth, which is essential in the nursing field.
Community Engagement: The applicant showcases their involvement in community health initiatives and volunteering, demonstrating a dedication to improving healthcare beyond the clinical setting.
Leadership Experience: The essay discusses leadership roles within the nursing program, emphasizing the applicant's understanding of nursing as a leadership role in healthcare.
Impactful Clinical Experience: The inclusion of the palliative care unit experience adds a unique perspective. It also adds an emotionally resonant dimension to the essay, highlighting the applicant's dedication to patient-centered care.

Scholarship Essay About Yourself

Some scholarship essays require a more personal touch. Scholarship committees are interested to learn about your experiences and how you express them.

Here is an example of an essay focusing on the applicant’s life experiences.

This scholarship essay effectively highlights the applicant's personal experiences and qualities that make them a suitable candidate for the scholarship. Here are some key elements that contributed to its success:

Values and Background: The essay begins by establishing the applicant's background and values, emphasizing the importance of education and family sacrifices.
Academic Excellence: The applicant showcases their commitment to academic excellence, including being named valedictorian, which adds credibility to their dedication to learning.
Passion and Career Goals: The essay highlights the applicant's interest in psychology and mental health, revealing their career aspirations and a deep sense of purpose.
Courage to Grow: The essay concludes with a strong commitment to education and the desire to use it as a tool for positive change in their community.

Winning Scholarship Essay Examples

You have read five scholarship essay examples with a complete analysis of why they were successful. Here are some more excellent examples that stand out due to similar reasons.

Read these samples and ask yourself, can you figure out why these essays catch the readers’ attention?

Sample Scholarship Essays

Sometimes, scholarship essays require a limited word count. You should always read the instructions and requirements of an essay before writing.

Here are two scholarship essay samples with different word limits.

500-Words Scholarship Essay Example About Career Goals

250 Words Scholarship Essay Example

Scholarship Essay Examples for Different Academic Levels

These scholarship essay examples cater to various academic levels. They demonstrate how students at different stages of their education can craft successful essays.

Scholarship Essay Example For High School Students

Scholarship Essay Example For College Application

Masters Scholarship Essay Example For Students

Scholarship Essay Examples - Why You Deserve This

These examples focus on explaining why the applicants deserve the scholarship, emphasizing their qualifications, achievements, and aspirations.

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Example

Why Should You Receive This Scholarship

There are many different prompts you can be assigned for your scholarship essay, so better be prepared. Check out this list of scholarship essay prompts to get a better idea!

Tips to Write a Winning Scholarship Essay

The following are some useful tips and suggestions for writing a successful scholarship essay:

Understand the Prompt: Carefully read and understand the essay prompt. Ensure that your response directly addresses the specific questions or topics provided. Tailor your essay to the scholarship's requirements.
Plan and Organize: Start with an essay outline . Identify key points you want to cover and the structure of your essay. A well-organized essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion is more engaging and easier to follow.
Be Authentic: Be true to yourself and your experiences. Authenticity resonates with scholarship committees. Share your genuine motivations, goals, and challenges, as it makes your essay more relatable.
Address Your Audience: Consider your audience, that is the scholarship selection committees. Tailor your essay to their expectations and values, emphasizing how you align with the scholarship's mission and goals.
Highlight Achievements and Impact: Showcase your accomplishments, both academic and extracurricular, and discuss the impact they've had on your life and your community. Explain how the scholarship will enable you to achieve even more.
Express Your Passion: Demonstrate your passion for your field of study or the cause the scholarship supports. Explain why you are deeply committed and how the scholarship will help you make a significant contribution.
Follow Instructions: Pay close attention to any specific instructions or requirements provided by the scholarship organization. Failure to comply with guidelines can lead to disqualification.
Revise and Rewrite: After an initial draft, take time to revise and rewrite your essay. Don't hesitate to make substantial changes if necessary to improve clarity, coherence, and impact.
Seek Feedback: Have someone else, such as a teacher, mentor, or family member, review your essay. Fresh perspectives can identify areas for improvement.

To conclude,

These essay examples were a good way to start. You’ve read and learnt the qualities that made them successful. Now, it’s your time to apply what you’ve learnt to your own scholarship essays.

Remember, crafting a winning scholarship essay takes time and effort. Be authentic and convey your aspirations, achievements, and the impact you hope to make. With dedication and these valuable tips, you can create a compelling scholarship essay that helps you achieve your education goals.

In addition, we understand that writing a scholarship essay can be incredibly difficult due to the high stakes. But don’t let the stress takeover, let our professional scholarship essay writing service handle it.

Our expert writers have written hundreds of successful scholarship essays with a high rate of success. Trust our write my essay website to craft a stand-out scholarship essay and achieve your academic goals!

Cathy has been been working as an author on our platform for over five years now. She has a Masters degree in mass communication and is well-versed in the art of writing. Cathy is a professional who takes her work seriously and is widely appreciated by clients for her excellent writing skills.

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How to write a financial need statement for your scholarship application (with examples!)

So you’re applying for a scholarship that asks you about your financial need. What do you say? How honest or specific should you be? What is TMI? In this article, we break down how to pen an awesome financial need scholarship essay or statement.

What to include in a financial need scholarship essay

Template to structure your financial need scholarship essay, introduction: your basic profile, body: your financial situation and hardships, conclusion: how you would benefit from this scholarship, was this financial need essay for a college financial aid application , now, reuse that same essay to apply for more scholarships, additional resources to help you write your financial need scholarship essay.

Writing a financial need scholarship essay

Many scholarships and college financial aid awards are “need-based,” given to students whose financial situation requires additional support. That’s why one of the most common college scholarship essays is a statement of financial need. This might be very explicit (“Explain your financial need”), somewhat explicit (“Describe your financial situation”), or quite open-ended (“Explain why you need this scholarship”).

In all cases, scholarship providers want to get a sense of your family’s financial picture: what your family income is, if you personally contribute to it (do you have a job?), and how much additional money you need to attend your target college (your “financial gap”).

If the essay prompt is a bit more open-ended (“Explain how this scholarship would help you”), your essay should probably be a combination of a financial need statement and a career goals / academic goals essay. That’s because you want to show how the award will help you financially and in your academic or career goals.

Usually this statement of financial need is a pretty short scholarship essay (150-300 words), so unlike a college essay or personal statement where you have ample word count to tell anecdotes, you’ll likely need to get right to the point.

Be sure to include:

If you are an underrepresented group at college, for instance, part of an ethnic minority or the first in your family to go to college
Any relevant family circumstances, like if your parents are immigrants or refugees, as well as your parents’ occupation and how many children/family members they support financially
How you are currently paying for college, including what you personally are doing to contribute financially (like working student jobs)
What financial challenges/difficulties your family is facing, for instance, if a parent recently lost their job
How you would benefit from the scholarship–including your academic and career goals (if word count allows)

Also remember to write in an optimistic tone. Writing about your financial situation or hardships might not be the most positive thing to share. But you can turn it around with an optimistic tone by writing about how these challenges have taught you resiliency and grit.

Student writing a financial need scholarship essay

Give a short introduction to who you are, highlighting any family characteristics that might make you part of an underrepresented group at college.

“I am a first-generation American and the first in my family to go to college. My family moved from El Salvador to New York when I was seven years old, to escape the violence there.”

Example 2:

“I am from a working-class family in Minnesota. My family never had a lot, but we pooled our efforts together to make ends meet. My parents both worked full-time (my father as a mechanic, my mother as a receptionist at the local gym), while my siblings and I all worked weekend jobs to contribute to the family income.”

Dive into the details. How are you currently planning to pay for college? The idea here is to show that you and your family have made a good-faith effort to earn enough money to pay your tuition, but that it has simply not been enough.

Make sure you describe your parents’ occupation, any savings (like a 529 College Savings Account), and any student jobs. You might also discuss any sudden changes in fortune (e.g. parent fell ill or lost their job) that have ruined your original financial plans.

Example

As immigrants with limited English, my parents have had to accept low-paying jobs. My father is an Uber driver, and my mother is a housekeeper. They earn just enough to pay our rent and put food on the table, so I’ve always known they could not help me pay for college. So I’ve been proactive about earning and saving my own money. Since age 11, I’ve worked odd jobs (like mowing my neighbors’ lawns). At age 16, I started working at the mall after school and on weekends. Through all these jobs, I’ve saved about $3000. But even with my financial aid grants, I need to pay $8000 more per year to go to college.

Bring it home by wrapping up your story. Explain how you plan to use the financial aid if you’re awarded this scholarship. How will you benefit from this award? What will you put the money toward, and how will it help you achieve your academic and/or career goals?

Scholarship review boards want to know that their money will be put to good use, supporting a student who has clear plans for the future, and the motivation and determination to make those plans a reality. This is like a shortened, one-paragraph version of the “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay .

Winning $5000 would help me close the financial gap and take less in student loans. This is particularly important for me because I plan to study social work and eventually work in a role to support my community. However, since these jobs are not well paid, repaying significant student loans would be difficult. Your scholarship would allow me to continue down this path, to eventually support my community, without incurring debt I can’t afford.

My plan is to study human biology at UC San Diego, where I have been admitted, and eventually pursue a career as a Nurse-Practitioner. I know that being pre-med will be a real academic challenge, and this scholarship would help me focus on those tough classes, rather than worrying about how to pay for them. The $2000 award would be equivalent to about 150 hours of working at a student job. That’s 150 hours I can instead focus on studying, graduating, and achieving my goals.

Sometimes this financial need statement isn’t for an external scholarship. Instead, it’s for your college financial aid office.

In that case, you’re usually writing this statement for one of two reasons:

You’re writing an appeal letter , to request additional financial aid, after your original financial aid offer wasn’t enough. In this case, you’ll want to make sure you’re being extra specific about your finances.
You’re applying for a specific endowed scholarship that considers financial need. In this case, your financial need essay can be quite similar to what we’ve outlined above.

Now that you’ve written a killer financial need scholarship essay, you have one of the most common scholarship essays ready on hand, to submit to other scholarships too.

You can sign up for a free Going Merry account today to get a personalized list of hundreds of scholarships matched to your profile. You can even save essays (like this one!) to reuse in more than one application.

You might also be interested in these other blog posts related to essay writing:

What’s the right scholarship essay format and structure?
How to write a winning scholarship essay about your academic goals
How to write an awesome essay about your career goals
Recent Posts

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Counselor Starter Guide: How to Use Going Merry’s Scholarship Platform - September 9, 2020
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IELTS Practice Tests and Preparation Tips

IELTS Writing

IELTS model essay: Are social skills more important than academic skills?

by Manjusha Nambiar · January 27, 2012

Companies now prefer to hire people with good social skills as well as good academic qualifications. Do you think that social skills are now getting more important than educational qualifications?

This question is taken from www.ielts-blog.com

You can spend 40 minutes on this task. You have to write at least 250 words.

Model answer

People having good social skills have always had an advantage over those who lack them. They happen to be more popular than their colleagues and get things done without much difficulty. Needless to say, companies prefer to hire people with good social skills and pleasing personalities.

Why do social skills matter in today’s job scenario? Social skills have always been important, but they have never commanded greater respect than they do now. Why? Well, just take a look at the way companies now advertise and sell their products. Traditional channels of advertising such as print and television ads are beginning to give way to interactive media like internet where potential consumers get to interact with marketers before they decide on a purchase. And when things get interactive, the one who is likely to be a winner is the one who has better social skills. Just about every company worth its salt now run online campaigns on social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter. Besides being cost effective, these campaigns are helpful in brand-building.

A few years ago, for most companies having an online presence simply meant owning a website of their own. Now these company websites are being replaced by Facebook fan pages and Twitter profiles. A great deal of brand building is now all about amassing Facebook likes and twitter followers. In such a scenario, companies can’t survive if they don’t hire people who can make their social campaigns successful. In the coming years, the emphasis on social skills will only increase.

Although I don’t think that social skills are more important than academic skills, possessing them is a must in jobs that require you to interact with people. Of course, social skills can’t replace academic skills or vice-versa and companies are unlikely to hire an under-educated person over a well-educated one just because the former has better social skills than the latter. But potential job-seekers can no longer ignore the importance of social skills. If they do, it will seriously hamper their job-worthiness. The good news is that just like academic skills social skills too can be learnt.

Tags: ielts essay ielts essay samples ielts essay writing ielts model essay ielts writing ielts writing task 2 sample ielts essay

Manjusha Nambiar

Hi, I'm Manjusha. This is my blog where I give IELTS preparation tips.

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Career Goals Essay For Scholarships (With Examples)

Apply For A Job
Applying To Multiple Jobs At The Same Company
Applying for a Job In-Person
Personal Mission Statement
Corporate Titles
Career Goals Essay
Internal Applicants Only
Vision Statement

Find a Job You Really Want In

Scholarship programs often want you to write a career goals essay to see that you have a clear plan for how you’ll apply your education to a specific career path. This helps show a scholarship committee why you’re seeking funds for the next step on the path toward your success.

Answering “what are your career goals” effectively can help increase your odds of impressing landing a scholarship opportunity. If you’re a prospective student applying for scholarships, this article will provide tips on how to write a career goals essay, along with essays on career goals examples to help you get an idea of what scholarship committees are looking for.

Key Takeaways:

When you’re writing a career goals essay, make sure to write about the goals that are relevant to the scholarship.

Be honest and use your own voice to stand out in your scholarship essay.

Go into detail about how the scholarship will help you achieve your goals.

What is a career goals essay?

Why scholarship essays ask about career goals, example career goals essay prompts, career goals essay examples, tips for writing a scholarship essay about career goals, what to write in a career goals essay if your goals have changed, career goals essay for a scholarship faq.

A career goals essay is a personal written explanation that discusses your background, why you’re interested in participating in the program, and what career you’d like this degree to lead into. A scholarship essay functions to explain why you want to achieve your professional goals and how you intend to get there.

In almost every application process, a portion asks the candidate to answer an essay question. When applying to an educational program, like an MBA, the essay prompt usually relates to your career goals .

Scholarship essays ask about career goals to assess your enthusiasm for the program, learn more about how the scholarship will help you, and ensure that you’ve considered how the program will help you achieve your goals for the future:

Assess your enthusiasm. Passion is important for scholarship administrators, and if you’re able to articulate your enthusiasm for a specific career path , it will show that you’re determined to meet the requirements to reach that goal. The most specific and well-thought-out your essay is, the easier it will be for a reader to understand your devotion and commitment to the program and the field it will allow you to enter.

Learn how the scholarship will help you. Having a firm grasp of your career goals is great, but it’s equally important that you express exactly how the specific program relates to those goals. This shows that you’ve researched the merits of the program and understand exactly how it fits into your professional goals.

Show you’ve considered your future. This goes along with the first two points — show that you know how to set goals and consider the path toward achieving those goals, and you’ll have an easier time convincing the reader that you’ll know how to set goals while participating in the program. They’ll see that you know how to prioritize education because you have a clear vision for navigating your career path.

While some scholarships might come right out and simply ask, “What are your career goals?” most will rework the question into something different that still accomplishes the same goal.

Below are some examples of career goals essay prompts that a scholarship program could pose to its applicants:

Discuss your career goals. Many scholarships prefer the most direct approach when giving an essay prompt to their applicants. This type of question gives the candidate a lot of wiggle room to discuss their passions, motivations, and career goals.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years ? This question is often used as a prompt for a career goals essay because it gives the applicant a timeline to describe their aspirations. It forces them to be realistic about where their career will be and how they will accomplish this within the next ten years.

How will this scholarship contribute to your professional success? A scholarship committee wants to be sure that the money they’re giving will contribute to a student’s overall professional success. This question asks about the applicant’s game plan in the long-term and evaluates how this program is going to assist in their future.

What is your dream job ? Since a dream job is often categorized as a person’s career goals, this is a common question phrasing in scholarship essays. Asking about a candidate’s dream job answers whether this program aligns with the student’s long-term career goals.

What matters most to you and why? Sometimes, a scholarship essay prompt won’t ask about your career or future at all. Instead, they’ll ask a question like this that assesses your motivations , values, and character.

Use these examples of career goals essays for scholarships to help write your own. Pay special attention to how they’re organized, rather than the content, to inspire your own career goals essay:

Career goals essay example 1 – Discuss your career goals

When I was six years old, I was riding bikes with my older sister around our neighborhood. She had just taught me how to ride, and I was excited to have to freedom to explore with her. When she was rounding a particularly difficult bend to see around, a car happened to be coming along at the same time. It struck her. That bike ride changed our lives forever. Over the next year, I went with my sister every Tuesday and Thursday to her physical therapist ’s appointments to help her regain walking strength. Watching her physical therapist patiently assist my sister back to becoming herself awoken something in me. A passion for helping others in the same way eventually turned into a career goal of becoming a physical therapist myself. I decided to get my bachelor’s degree in exercise science. After graduating in 2019, I knew that the next step for me was to attend a graduate program in physical therapy. I was accepted to Lassell University Master of Science in Rehabilitation Services. This presented me with my latest goal along my career path, and I’m eagerly waiting to start. This scholarship would help me afford the wonderful opportunity to be a part of the Lassell University class of 2023, allowing me to continue working towards my ultimate career goal of becoming a physical therapist and helping others to become themselves again.

Career goals essay example 2 – Where do you see yourself in ten years?

In ten years, I will have been successfully running my own construction business for about five years. I’m currently a second-year student at the University of Texas, pursuing a master’s degree in business administration. I decided to get my MBA because I knew it would be a positive asset toward my long-term career goal of owning a construction business. In my high school years, I worked as a construction apprentice for a local business. I loved many aspects of the business, such as building something from nothing. I knew that I wanted to incorporate this work into my long-term career, but I didn’t want to work as an apprentice . This led me to pursue business. In ten years and with the help of this scholarship, I will have graduated with my MBA almost a decade prior . After graduation, I plan to take a business administration internship with a carpentry business to help myself get a footing in the field. After about two years of this, I will have started my own construction business.

Career goals essay example 3 – What matters most to you and why?

The people I surround myself with matter most to me. Whether it be my relatives, friends, or professional acquaintances, I always care the most about the happiness of the people around me. Making the people around me happy matters the most to me because I truly because we find our happiness through others. I believe that this drive to make a positive impression on the people around me is what drove me towards a career as a nurse . I always thought of hospitals as places where people need someone to support them and make their day a little happier. I wanted to be one of those who spend their careers positively impacting people in need. This scholarship will enable me to finally afford nursing school and go after my dream job full force.

Career goals essay example 4 – What are your short- and long-term career goals, and how will earning this degree contribute to achieving those goals? Please provide a minimum of 200 words.

My short-term career goals involve working directly with underprivileged young people to increase the literacy rate in my community. As a student of an underfunded and understaffed school, I’ve seen firsthand how much of an impact early literacy education makes on long-term achievement. It broke my heart to see my peers embarrassed at their struggle with reading at an advanced age, and this shame added another dimension to their lack of opportunity. Being a literacy educator for young people would allow me to serve this community directly to show them not only the necessity of strong written communication skills, but the joy of reading for pleasure. This program focuses specifically on early literacy, and would provide me a direct route to a career in serving the community I hope to serve. As for long-term career goals, I hope to one day create a program where socioeconomically parents can bring their children for literacy education, not only to increase their ability to navigate the world of language, but also to instill confidence and joy in the written word. What drew me to this program was that it also has administrative, legal, and business dimensions that would set me on the path toward achieving this goal.

Here are some tips to keep in mind for writing a career goals scholarship essay:

Write about goals relevant to the scholarship. Although you may have many different kinds of goals for your personal and professional future, a scholarship essay only discusses objectives that are relevant to the program you’re applying for.

Be honest. Applying for a scholarship is stressful because the applicant’s education is usually reliant on receiving these funds in one way or another. Even though it’s tempting to exaggerate your skills or pretend you’re more passionate about something than you are to make yourself a more competitive applicant, it’s a bad move.

Use your own, unique voice. The essay portion of a scholarship application is your chance to stand out by using your voice. Nobody else, regardless of their academic or professional achievements, is you. Make this clear in your career goals scholarship essay by keeping your unique written voice engrained in the words you produce.

Be specific. A big reason that scholarship committees ask applicants to write a career goals essay is to determine how prepared they are in planning their long-term professional goals. They aren’t interested in providing a scholarship to students who aren’t going to follow through with their career plans.

Explain long and short-term goals . Even if the essay prompt asks you to describe where you see yourself in ten years, you still need to tell them the steps leading towards this picture of success.

Include the short-term goals that add up to your larger career objectives in your essay response. Explain how accomplishing the smaller goals gives you an advantage when tackling long-term ones.

Explain how the program and scholarship will help you. Before writing your career goals essay, consider how this program and scholarship will help you in your career. The answer to this question is essential.

Follow the essay formatting guidelines. This may sound obvious, but it’s surprisingly easy to forget this step when your essay is finally flowing and when you’re scrambling to get it submitted on time.

Check, double-check , and triple-check the essay guidelines for content, word count, and formatting requirements. If you miss any of these steps, your essay may be immediately disqualified no matter how good it or the rest of your application is.

Many times career goals essays are written by students who have already completed at least some college or are applying to a post-graduate program and need more money to continue.

There’s a good chance that your career goals have changed since you started or graduated college. For example, say you wanted to be an engineer , so you got your undergraduate degree in engineering but realized you didn’t like it after working in the industry for a few years.

You decided that nursing would be more up your alley, and now you’re applying for a scholarship for a nursing program. While this isn’t unusual, it can make it more difficult to write a career goals essay since your past work doesn’t necessarily match your future goals.

In this case, you’ll simply need to explain why you changed your career path and why this next one is the best choice for you. Share your decision-making process to show that you haven’t taken the switch lightly, and talk about what you’ve already done to try to pursue this path.

How do you write a career goal for a scholarship essay?

You write a career goal for a scholarship essay by sharing your passion, explaining both your long- and short-term goals, and relating your goals to the scholarship.

Explain why you want to pursue the career you’re pursuing, where you hope to be in the future and how you plan to get there, and how the scholarship will help you do this.

How do you describe your career goals in an essay?

You describe your career goals in an essay by explaining what you want to do in your career, why you decided on this career path, and what you’ve done so far to make that a reality.

You can usually work these factors into any prompt you receive, so think through them before you start writing so that you can use them as an outline of sorts.

What are career goals examples?

Examples of career goals include:

Working as a grant writer for a nonprofit organization.

Becoming a department manager and eventually an executive in your field.

Owning your own plumbing company.

Caring for underserved communities as a nurse practitioner .

What are some goals for success?

Some goals for success include growing in your role, building your network, and finding joy in the job. Most careers don’t just happen overnight and require you to set the right milestones that work best for you. Not everyone will have the same goals for success.

How do you start a career goals essay for a scholarship?

You can start a career goals essay for a scholarship by directly answering the prompt. Most scholarship prompts include a word count of between 200 and 500 words, so it’s essential that you immediately respond to the prompt. Attention-grabbing sentences and narratives can be helpful for setting the scene, but an efficient and direct answer will show a clarity of mind that helps enhance the quality of your answer.

BLS – Career planning for high schoolers

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Sky Ariella is a professional freelance writer, originally from New York. She has been featured on websites and online magazines covering topics in career, travel, and lifestyle. She received her BA in psychology from Hunter College.

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Essay on Management

Article On Educational Qualification

Type of paper: Article

Topic: Management , Development , Community , Education , Real Estate , Skills , Training , Performance

Published: 07/30/2021

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Introduction

I am a citizen of United States of America with many achievements that I have accomplished over the years. I have educational qualification of up to master in educational management. I got my bachelor degree of science in commerce in the University of Santo Thomas where I graduated with first class owners. I later joined the De LaSalle University where I got a masters degree in educational management.

Over the year in my working experience, I have always done my best and awarded for the good work that I have been doing. In the most recent recognition in my work the www. Apartment ratings .com increased my rating from 15% to 95% due to my exemplary performance.

I always have a positive attitude and always committed to enhance quality and standard in my work performance. Over the year, I have always demonstrated proficiency in area of management, decision-making, organization skills, negotiation, and leadership in all the organization I have worked with. I have a ten years experience in office management with excellent strategy planning and forecasting skills. I am perfect in technology with high qualification in computer skill from recognized institution. I have excellent customer service that is rated to be 99% from the rating with apartment rating company.

I have worked with BRE properties from June 2004 to March 2013 as a community manager in lakeshore landing where I used to manage 308 units. I started as a bookkeeper but because of my performance in work I was promoted to community manager .I have a kingsely of 4 in all categories. I also managed 490 units in lakeshore landing and foster landing. I have also good management skill in finance and always ensure there is accountability of fund. Among this qualification, I have many more on my Curriculum vitae that is on my website.

I always have a desire to bring change in real estate world. I am always committed to enhance quality in services we deliver to customers. The other thing I would like to change in the sector of real estate is to enhance the welfare of the stakeholders in the industry. My main objective in real estate is to always ensure there is professionalism in Quality and standard enhancement.

Mandela, Nelson. Conversations with Myself. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2010.

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Kosovo Crisis Simulation

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This assignment asks students to critically reflect on the ethics of their role in an in-class simulation. We simulate the 1999 crisis in Kosovo, especially the months leading up to the NATO decision to begin airstrikes over Kosovo aimed at preventing the wider spread of ethnic cleansing by Serbian forces of the Kosovar Albanian population.

Mustafa Suleyman, DeepMind and Inflection Co-founder, joins Microsoft to lead Copilot

Mar 19, 2024 | Microsoft Corporate Blogs

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Satya Nadella, Chief Executive Officer, shared the below communication today with Microsoft employees.

I want to share an exciting and important organizational update today. We are in Year 2 of the AI platform shift and must ensure we have the capability and capacity to boldly innovate.

There is no franchise value in our industry and the work and product innovation we drive at this moment will define the next decade and beyond. Let us use this opportunity to build world-class AI products, like Copilot, that are loved by end-users! This is about science, engineering, product, and design coming together and embracing a learning mindset to push our innovation culture and product building process forward in fundamental ways.

In that context, I’m very excited to announce that Mustafa Suleyman and Karén Simonyan are joining Microsoft to form a new organization called Microsoft AI, focused on advancing Copilot and our other consumer AI products and research.

Mustafa will be EVP and CEO, Microsoft AI, and joins the senior leadership team (SLT), reporting to me. Karén is joining this group as Chief Scientist, reporting to Mustafa. I’ve known Mustafa for several years and have greatly admired him as a founder of both DeepMind and Inflection, and as a visionary, product maker, and builder of pioneering teams that go after bold missions.

Karén, a Co-founder and Chief Scientist of Inflection, is a renowned AI researcher and thought leader, who has led the development of some of the biggest AI breakthroughs over the past decade including AlphaZero.

Several members of the Inflection team have chosen to join Mustafa and Karén at Microsoft. They include some of the most accomplished AI engineers, researchers, and builders in the world. They have designed, led, launched, and co-authored many of the most important contributions in advancing AI over the last five years. I am excited for them to contribute their knowledge, talent, and expertise to our consumer AI research and product making.

At our core, we have always been a platform and partner-led company, and we’ll continue to bring that sensibility to all we do. Our AI innovation continues to build on our most strategic and important partnership with OpenAI. We will continue to build AI infrastructure inclusive of custom systems and silicon work in support of OpenAI’s foundation model roadmap, and also innovate and build products on top of their foundation models. And today’s announcement further reinforces our partnership construct and principles.

As part of this transition, Mikhail Parakhin and his entire team, including Copilot, Bing, and Edge; and Misha Bilenko and the GenAI team will move to report to Mustafa. These teams are at the vanguard of innovation at Microsoft, bringing a new entrant energy and ethos, to a changing consumer product landscape driven by the AI platform shift. These organizational changes will help us double down on this innovation.

Kevin Scott continues as CTO and EVP of AI, responsible for all-up AI strategy, including all system architecture decisions, partnerships, and cross-company orchestration. Kevin was the first person I leaned on to help us manage our transformation to an AI-first company and I’ll continue to lean on him to ensure that our AI strategy and initiatives are coherent across the breadth of Microsoft.

Rajesh Jha continues as EVP of Experiences & Devices and I’m grateful for his leadership as he continues to build out Copilot for Microsoft 365, partnering closely with Mustafa and team.

There are no other changes to the senior leadership team or other organizations.

We have been operating with speed and intensity and this infusion of new talent will enable us to accelerate our pace yet again.

We have a real shot to build technology that was once thought impossible and that lives up to our mission to ensure the benefits of AI reach every person and organization on the planet, safely and responsibly. I’m looking forward to doing so with you.

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Lydia Polgreen

The Islamophobic Smear Campaign Dividing Democrats

A black and white photograph of Adeel Abdullah Mangi broken into several squares. The blue and black squares are set against a gray background.

By Lydia Polgreen

Opinion Columnist

On paper, President Biden’s nominee to fill a vacancy on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Third Circuit, Adeel Abdullah Mangi, is an archetypical candidate for a federal judgeship. Mangi has a sterling legal education, which he followed with a distinguished career at a high-profile private firm mixing corporate litigation with important pro bono work. He also has a classic American story: He grew up in a poor country dreaming of a career as a lawyer and immigrated to the United States, where he ascended to the heights of his profession.

The candidate has another quality that was especially appealing to Biden, who has made diversifying the federal bench a key priority: Mangi would be the first Muslim American federal appellate judge in the United States.

When Mangi appeared before the Senate Judiciary Committee in December for a hearing about this lifetime appointment, Republican senators did not ask him about his legal background or judicial philosophy. “Do you condemn the atrocities of Hamas terrorists?” Senator Ted Cruz of Texas demanded of Mangi, a Pakistani American with no connection to Hamas or Palestinians other than the fact that he is Muslim, along with 1.8 billion other people across the globe.

Such bad faith ambushes are Cruz’s stock in trade, especially since the Oct. 7 attack on Israel by Hamas. So it was hardly a surprise that he and his Republican colleagues spent their allotted time insinuating that Mangi was an antisemite and an apologist not just for Hamas but also for the perpetrators of Sept. 11.

But what is much more worrying is that these tactics could work on some Senate Democrats. Right-wing judicial activists have been running a smear campaign against Mangi, including advertisements aimed at Senate Democrats like Jon Tester of Montana and Bob Casey of Pennsylvania, who are battling for re-election. The campaigns describe Mangi, with no evidence, as an antisemite and attempt to link him to Hamas and other terrorist groups. This means that Democrats who run the risk of losing their seats come November may see defending Mangi’s nomination as a potential risk to their chances at re-election. The campaign seems to be working. Over the past few days, CNN and HuffPost have reported that there may not be enough Democratic votes to confirm Mangi.

This is an outrage. The attacks on Mangi are utterly disingenuous. Major Jewish organizations, including the Anti-Defamation League, have made statements of support for Mangi, whose pro bono legal work has focused in part on fighting for religious liberty and against religious bias across multiple faiths. The American Jewish Committee, which has joined several amicus briefs to the Supreme Court led by Mangi, described him as “a person of integrity, champion of pluralism and adversary of discrimination against any group.”

Abandoning Mangi’s nomination would be an unconscionable act at any time, but especially perilous for Democrats in the current political climate, when tens of thousands of Democratic primary voters in key states are expressing their outrage at Biden’s policy in Gaza by voting uncommitted. Meanwhile, the right is using the attacks on Oct. 7 and the ensuing war in Gaza as a means to imply that any Muslim could be pro-Hamas or antisemitic. If Democrats acquiesce, they will set a dangerous precedent.

Of course, the crucial background for the attacks on Mangi is the wave of Islamophobia that has swept the country over the past six months. The Council on American-Islamic Relations reported at the end of 2023 that it saw a 216 percent increase in reports of bias and requests for assistance from the previous year. A 6-year-old boy was stabbed to death in what investigators are calling a hate crime days after the Oct. 7 Hamas attacks, and three college students of Palestinian origin were shot in Burlington, Vt., last Thanksgiving weekend, stunning that small, progressive city.

But this goes beyond Islamophobia, as heinous as it is, and beyond Israel and Gaza. The basic ideals of the Democratic Party, including the moral and legal obligation to provide asylum to those fleeing persecution, seem up for grabs . On immigration more broadly, the party has acquiesced to right-wing talking points, failing to prevent or even helping the firm shove of the Overton window to the right. For all the Democratic talk about a freedom agenda , the party has not really seized religious liberty, one of Mangi’s core areas of pro bono work, as part of its vision of a pluralistic and inclusive society.

“By allowing the far right to frame Mangi’s historic nomination with bogus Islamophobic smears and divide-and-conquer Senate Democrats, we aren’t just losing a nominee; we’re surrendering the entire debate on our core values of multiracial democracy and religious freedom,” Waleed Shahid, a veteran Democratic operative who has helped spearhead the uncommitted movement, told me.

While the Democrats waver, it is clear what kind of America the Republican Party wants. Republican values were on full display at Mangi’s confirmation hearing. Republican senators harangued Mangi for his tenuous links to a Rutgers Law School institute, accusing him of holding views espoused by speakers invited as panelists at the institute.

That institute, the Center for Security, Race and Rights , has indeed invited provocative speakers, in service of fostering dialogue on complex and sometimes difficult subjects. Even so, Mangi had no role in selecting such speakers or determining the programming at the institute. He repeatedly, with admirable patience, condemned terrorism and condemned any attempt to justify acts of terrorism.

In recent days, as his nomination seemed to be teetering, prominent Democrats spoke up in his defense.

“Adeel Mangi has faced a barrage of outrageous and unfounded smears because of his religious faith,” said Senator Cory Booker of New Jersey, Mangi’s home state. “When we look at Mr. Mangi’s record — the totality of his professional life, his commitment to religious freedom and civil rights, his testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee — it only reinforces his commitment to upholding and advancing the fundamental values we all hold as Americans.”

The Biden administration is speaking out to urge Mangi’s confirmation without delay, calling him “an extraordinarily qualified nominee who is devoted to the rule of law, lived the American dream through hard work, proven his integrity and would make history on the bench,” Andrew Bates, a White House spokesman, told me, warning that “no senator should cave to hateful, undignified lies.”

If Senate Democrats backpedal in response to the right-wing smear campaign against Mangi, they squander a perfect opportunity to demonstrate the stark difference between their party and the G.O.P. at a time when some Democrats have become deeply disillusioned with their party’s ceding of ground to the right.

As the presidential election grinds on, it is clear that racism and Islamophobia lie at the core of the Republican Party’s revanchist campaign. Donald Trump, echoing fascist leaders throughout history, has declared that immigrants are “poisoning the blood of our country,” and when offered the opportunity to walk back or soften this inflammatory phrase by Fox News’s Howard Kurtz recently, Trump instead doubled down . “Why do you use words like ‘vermin’ and ‘poisoning of the blood’?” Kurtz asked. “Because our country is being poisoned,” Trump replied.

What better retort is there to this vicious notion than the formidable accomplishments of Adeel Mangi? He is an exemplar of how immigration has made the United States a stronger, richer, more powerful nation. He was drawn to the United States and the law by watching “Matlock” as a child in Karachi, Pakistan. In his pro bono legal work he represents another venerable American tradition: a devotion to protecting the freedom of all Americans to peacefully practice their faiths without interference, prejudice or coercion from the state, a notion the right has sought to upend .

I would ask any Democrat considering voting against this nominee this question: What vision of America do you actually believe in, if not the one exemplified by the life and work of a man like Adeel Mangi? Republicans have been very clear about who they are and what kind of future they imagine for our country. Confirming this nominee without delay would offer a powerful and necessary contrast to that dark vision and an opportunity for Democrats to tell us which America they stand for.

Source photograph by Graeme Sloan/Sipa, via Associated Press.

The Times is committed to publishing a diversity of letters to the editor. We’d like to hear what you think about this or any of our articles. Here are some tips . And here’s our email: [email protected] .

Follow the New York Times Opinion section on Facebook , Instagram , TikTok , WhatsApp , X and Threads .

Lydia Polgreen is an Opinion columnist and a co-host of the “ Matter of Opinion ” podcast for The Times.

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Educational Qualifications Essay
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That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values. Types of goals include: Career goals. Goals for personal growth. The type of friend you want to be. The change you want to make in the world. Values could include: Authenticity.
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